Wednesday, August 22, 2018

Word du jour

We see today that according to the minions of NewSpeak, that The Hole Formerly Known As Vagina ("THFKAV" if you're acronymically inclined) is now to be called the "front hole".

As a lexicographer and wordsmith, both for fun and professionally, allow me therefore to throw out the first pitch:

Shrillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, the loudmouthed broads on The Spew, and Jane Fonda are therefore all frunts.

You heard it here first. Use that word liberally.
(And forgive the unintended pun right there.) I feel it is destined for greatness.

Added bonus: you can use it in distinguished company, and no one will be shocked.
At least not right off.
And it won't be bleeped or censored. Yet.

But I have hopes.


Tactless Wookie said...

Oh dear GOD. I am laughing my head off. That is a work of genius mister!

Reltney McFee said...

May I proffer, as an alternative, "That Orifice Formerly Known As Vagina"?

Making the acronym TOFKAV.

I agree, on the other hand, that Mrs. Clinton, Mrs. Pelosi, and Ms. Fonda et al are, indeed, "frunts" as well as "fronts (in the latter case, fronts for murderous communists).

Anonymous said...

Nicely done Aesop!

Brenda said...

Awesome! I would have spewed over the computer keys if I was drinking! Hysterical!!

Anonymous said...

Fun with euphemisms and whatnot. OK. I'll play Since the leftist vermin despise "illegal immigrant" so much, I have a new one to introduce. It's descriptive, fitting and as an added bouns, it saves a wee bit o' typing. The word is "crimmigrants".

Wendy (KekistanTrans) said...

When I first heard that some people want to use the term 'Front Hole' instead of 'Vagina' I thought it was a joke. But it appears the politically correct grammer police want to use the "front hole" term in order to not offend transgender women (who are women too - because they say they are) who just happen to have a penis where their vagina would be if they had been born a female.

A vagina is not just a "front hole" for sex. This is the kind of thinking by people that want to reduce a woman down to simply someone with a front hole to insert a penis (or dildo) into.

The vagina is an entrance used for sexual reproduction and as a child birthing canal. That is what makes a woman special over any male who starts any kind of gender transition journey at any age with feminizing hormones and surgery to be a close outside appearance approximation to a natural born woman but who will never menstruate and who can never carry or give birth to a live hum an child.

I keep thinking one of these times the transgender movement is going to jump the shark and society at large will finally hit "peak trans" and it will all go downhill for them from there. But then again we just keep going further and further along with this kind of crazy stuff, so who knows...

Having a bit of experience among the Transgender crowd I seriously don't know why the term 'Vagina' is offensive to people who refer to their penis as their 'girl-dick' and their anus and rectum as their 'ass-pussy'.
I would also think the term "Pride" (as in the LGBT 'Pride' celebrations and marches) would mean naming exactly what you do and being proud of it. Not wanting to hide things and demanding that people change the language they use in order to obscure what things really are.

Even straight guys have a sense of humor about non-conventional sex ('If the red river is running take the dirt road home' comes to mind).

But I guess if "going down on your girlfriend" means sucking a dick instead of licking a clit then I guess I can see how someone might be offended by terms that define things in specifc biological real terms.

Anonymous said...

+1 brother Aesop, you win the intardnet for today, and likely for the week. "Cucking frunts" are those who married the frunt. Billy Jeff Spitoon for example... married to Fruntary Pantsuit Spitoon. Yes, she needed him to extend her dreams of glory and grandeur - and he needed her daddy's money. Easy peasy.
- Grandpa

Anonymous said...

Frunts, huh? Additionally, well drillers might add that the "et al's" cited are also "dry holes". Bottomless pits also comes to mind.

Anonymous said...

That is FUNNY, my inner 12 year old is laughing his butt off. No offense intended to our female readers though.

Jabber said...

Frumpy frunts, at that.

FiftycalTX said...

But what about the #1 or "pee-pee" hole? It is kinda in or just above the "front hole". So what do we call that? The "little front hole" as opposed to the "big front hole"? Or should this all just be the "all front hole"?

Anonymous said...

Just when I thought Amerika could not become any more crazier or depraved, I read this article. I do not have enough ammunition or firearms. It's time to unleash the real Boondock Saints.

Anonymous said...

Now do I pronounce THFKAV like 'Thief Cave' or 'Thiff Cav'?

Henry said...

I am reminded of the hen’s cloaca (Latin, “sewer”), the one-hole-serves-all design solution of the lower animals. Since these days it’s common to use any orifice for anything you like, perhaps it’s time for humanity to devolve and de-specialize again.

Anonymous said...

Or as one woman commented on another site, It's the middle hole.
The way I see it, these people deserve a good old fashioned swift kick in the back hole.

Anonymous said...

I'll do my part you glorious frunts!

Anonymous said...

May I suggest "cloaca?"
Per the common cavity into which the intestinal, urinary, and generative canals open in birds, reptiles, amphibians, many fishes, and certain mammals.
That should cover every variation of the "56 genders" meme.