Showing posts with label chickens coming home to roost. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chickens coming home to roost. Show all posts

Thursday, July 11, 2024

Toldja So

 h/t zerohedge/Tyler Durden

















All the "nothing will happen" naysayers can now officially suck it.

For the Baby Ducks and wiseasses out there, I told you the [R] party has a long institutional memory. They didn't get to pull Edith Wilson in. They didn't expose Frank the Cripple. But after Watergate, you can damn sure betcha they're going after Biden's handlers tooth and claw.

As usual, it's not the petty crime at the beginning that's the problem, it's the coverup, which turns into conspiracy and obstruction.

This is a brushfire that's got plenty of dry kindling, and it's going to create its own winds.

The Stupid party may bauble it, they may bumble it, but they damned sure can smell the blood in the water. And if they work this right, it'll be nothing but the Joetato Dementia Show & White House Sh*tshow Coverup, from now until November, 16 hours a day.

Tuesday, July 9, 2024

Bummer For All Y'All

If you thought Sen. Kneepads as veep was bad, wait'll you get a pantload of this @$$clown (Pelosi's nephew, FTW!)

He's currently polling as less popular than Emperor Poopypants, lawyers, and syphilis  hereabouts, when last we checked. We're only about $50B in debt now.

When you take back Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer, 3/4 of loudmouth Hollyweird, 10M of your toothless, banjo-playing kinfolk, and ship back 15M illegal aliens nested here, we can talk about not palming him off on everyone else.

Until then, you have this coming to you. Not so funny now, is it? Well, except locally.
Gardez l'eau!

Monday, July 1, 2024

Calling Captain Obvious

























Exactly as Stevie Wonder could see even from space, the drumbeat of calls for Sen. Kneepads to convene the Cabinet and declare Emperor Poopypants mentally unfit to warm the chair in the Oval Office grows by the minute. Speaker Of the House Johnson wasn't shy at all Friday in saying that

if he were in Biden's Cabinet, "I would be having that discussion with my colleagues at the Cabinet level."
I wouldn't want to get overconfident, but it seems like, with the prospect of a Cornucopia Of Payback for Watergate in the wind, the Squish Party may have - finally, at long last - found its spinal column and testicles. Mirabile dictu!

From here on out, that drumbeat becomes a cacophony. All the Speaker has to do is shut down the Congress, at his sole discretion, indefinitely, and it's not a matter of if, but when.

No legislation. No floor debates. No ancillary business. No subcommittee meetings. No appropriations. No judicial or executive appointments. 80:20 the Speaker has the House sergeant at arms and Capitol Police hold the members on the premises for quorum calls indefinitely.

And the one thing the Republican majority House is guaranteed to do, and sooner rather than later, is start holding public hearings, after subpoenaing everyone in the Executive branch, about what they knew about Poopypants' profound mental incapacity, when they knew it, and who orchestrated covering up his condition. (And let's be serious: this was obvious to everyone but the In-The-Tank-For-The-2020-Coup crowd, in and out of government, for years now.)

The second-day hearing will be the public waterboardings of the entire Joint Chiefs Of Staff of the military branches, asking why or why not they have or haven't quietly replaced the nuclear football that's never more than two steps from any POTUS, and replaced the contents with coloring books and crayons.

If they say they have, they effectively ratify his incompetence, and admit to holding a soft coup themselves.

If they say they haven't, they admit their own incompetence and manifest unfitness for high command.

Having a few US Marshals standing by during their testimony with pre-filled out contempt of Congress citations and referrals for treason would probably do wonders for their collective candor and recollection. 

In any event, that question-and-answer session is going to be a fire-and-brimstone debacle of biblical proportions, followed inevitably by the most searing come-to-Jesus confessions from anytime since the Civil War.

Either way, it will be scorched earth, and Dementia Joe will be on a BBQ spit the entire time.

The meetings on government oversight on Day Three will be who, to the last detail, has been making executive decisions, and since when, starting five seconds after Biden's inauguration.

There will be a stack of blank arrest warrants for that one, ready to be referred to the US Attorney for Washington DC, who's going to either become the busiest man in DC, or the first one strung up for treason.

At that point, in the memorable words of Don Henley, "somebody's going to emergency, somebody's going to jail", and in a New York minute.

Stock up on frosty beverages and popcorn.

And depending on what one unelected black-robed jackass in NYFC thinks he can do next week, you might want to check your inventory of olive drab cans.

This is the kind of thing where, historically, countries go pear-shaped out of nowhere, and then everywhere.

Saturday, March 16, 2024

If They'd Only Known Dept., Pt. II

 


No points for guessing how it's going to work out here,
as the Turd World streams into the country at
unchecked flood rates.


Friday, March 15, 2024

If They'd Only Known Dept.

h/t cw 


I almost hated to fool around with these classic posters. Almost. But I couldn't help but touch them up a bit, with some 20/20 hindsight.

Friday, January 19, 2024

The Wall Always Wins

And it's getting cold out there. 

Seen on a dating site:




Thursday, September 7, 2023

Wave Goodbye To Liberty Safe

 h/t June J commenting at Divemedic's blog










This is what happens to your company when the light you're steering by is Bud Light.

And Kirk's blurb? That's a kill-shot. To the head.


FWIW:

Liberty Safe and Security Products

1199 West Utah Avenue

Payson UT 84651

I plan on sending them a single square of toilet paper, and suggesting they use it to get the FBI's excrement off their noses. YMMV.


Saturday, June 24, 2023

And The Hits Just Keep On Coming...


 













NM Prosecutors charge Rust armorer with evidence tampering, drug charges

Christmas in June, I tell ya!

From Variety

In a filing earlier this month, special prosecutors Kari Morrissey and Jason Lewis alleged that Gutierrez Reed had been “drinking heavily and smoking marijuana in the evenings during the shooting of Rust.” They argued that was relevant to the case because she was “likely” hungover when she loaded a live round into Baldwin’s gun.

They also alleged that after the shooting, Gutierrez Reed had “walked off with the firearm for a considerable amount of time” before the deputies arrived on scene.

Further revelations are that the chief investigator thinks the D.A.office is nothing but screw-ups, despite the fact that he was the one who wrote up all the clusterf**k of half-assed charges that the D.A. had to drop against Baldwin.

Is there anyone in public service in Santa Fe who isn't a total assclown?

All evidence thus far suggests "No."

Friday, June 23, 2023

Breaking: And The Devolution Begins In Russia

 









(UK Telegraph) Head of Wagner Group Launches Armed Coup Against Russian Army

Not A Joke. Read the details at the link. RTWT. It's worldwide news, as of an hour ago. I could post 80 links. All with the same details.

Putin cheerleaders' response:


(FTR, the Wagner Group was doing most of the heavy lifting, and was the one force universally - by Russian, Ukrainian, and neutral third party sources - acknowledged to be worth a damn on Russia's side in this sh*tshow. Of course, that was before Wagner Group burned through something like 80-90% casualties trying and failing to capture Bakhmut for 6 months. Prigozhin is understandably a tad pissed off about that debacle.)

Yesiree, it sure sounds like Russia's got the Ukes on the ropes, by golly, and Any Day Now™ Russian troops will conquer all of Ukraine. 

When they ride into Kiev on flying pigs.


Babylon Bee headline, tomorrow: Prigozhin Denies Coup Attempt; Russian MoD Sends Him On Next OceanGate Tour Of Titanic

@1:06ff..."one of our commanders...went a little,...funny in the head..."

And now, yet again, an appropriate air:


"Well...shit."

It's truly a sad day for everyone when a murdering ex-KGB Russian dick-tater can't hire a reliable mercenary prison-convict-hiring ruthless warlord who doesn't turn out to be a disloyal backstabbing sonofabitch.


Saturday, June 3, 2023

Break YouTube

 "Ridicule is man's most potent weapon." - Saul Alinsky, Rules For Radicals


Dear Boutique Tar-Gay,

Congrats on becoming the 2023 exemplar of United Breaks Guitars, served with a six-pack chaser of Butt Light (NYSE value: worthless).  And as usual, you can't buy this kind of business-crashing negative publicity. It always comes to the recipient absolutely free, and overly well-deserved. Braindead Tone-deaf Stupidity: Achievement Unlocked!

You idiots are no exception, and equally clueless how you managed to pour gasoline in your own lap, and then try to stub out a lit road flare with your crotch. Bravely done, mega-morons. Your entry into Jackass: Billionaire Corporate Retard Version is accepted with pleasure. Let the games begin!

The bleeding will stop the minute you stop trying to shoot your own dicks off. Over and over and over. And then make a humble and sincere apology for screwing things up so royally, on behalf of a demographically microscopic group of freaks and mental health cripples, and stop! Stop! STOP! pimping and pandering their disgusting agenda! (Clever readers will denote a subtle hint there.)










(Montgomery Wards, J.C. Penney, and Sears Roebuck & Co. would like a word with you about what happens to slow learners in the retail game. Or maybe you still have some of your Mervyn's former executives on file somewhere. Have a nice trip; see you next fall.)

Until your executive lackwits heed that advice, it's going to be hilarious watching you set yourselves on fire anew, time and time again. And at least your board of directors can get their ceremonial hockey helmets at an employee discount, before next they venture forth into the world unsupervised by any actual competent adults.

What's next? Hiring Bill Cosby as your next celebutard spokeshole, and dusting off the ad campaign for New Coke™? Maybe call it New Woke!? Genius!!!

Well-played, you corporate (or should that be coprophile?) sh*t-for-brains groomers. Be sure to look both ways before getting thrown under the bus.



Friday, April 7, 2023

Now You Know How It Got This Way


I don't mind taking the heat for people like Gov. Moonbeam, or even RuPaul. They're both fucking lunatics, but they were actually born here, so tagging them as "Californian" is actually correct. We own them fair and square, dammit all to hell. But Nancy Pelosi is a Baltimoron. Barbara Boxer was dumped here from NYFC. Maxine Waters carpetbagged here from St. Louis. Multiply that phenomenon times 20 million batshit crazy motherfuckers from everywhere else but here, the exact ones I lump together as "your toothless, banjo-playing kinfolk".

Because. They. Are.

Sometimes we come out ahead on the deal. John Wayne or Ronald Reagan come to mind. But comedy requires humor and truth to be funny. Miss either component, like the lame meme at the header, and the mixture explodes in your face like a Tom and Jerry cigar. Certain mentally lazy dumbshits need to own the fact that Bruce/Caitlin/Whateverthefuck he's calling himself this month Jenner is from New York Fucking State, and realize that's true for exactly 90% of the fruitcakes and dipshits you try and tag us for. It's a statistical certainty. They're mainly and overwhelmingly actually your homegrown fucktards and always have been; the sooner you own up to that, the quicker you'll stop sounding like the barely-brighter cousins of your toothless banjo-playing kinfolk, who've been sadly temporarily exported here, until they achieved critical mass. Which has consequences, both for us, and eventually, for you.

One of the main reasons I stay here (besides this being my home), is because your idiot relatives have fucked it up so badly that it has to collapse, inevitably. What cannot continue, won't.

And then they'll return to the home nest. O frabjous day! Callou! Callay!

Bonus for you: Those 10 million illegal aliens here you couldn't notice until they started hanging around outside your Home Depot? The ones Lindsay Grahamnesty and Marco ScrewYoubio thought were nifty imports as housekeepers and janitors?

Cheer up. When this socilaist paradise collapses, and the statues of Marx and Lenin come down in Sacramento, Hollyweird, and San Franshitco, they follow Caitlin and Nancy and Maxine right back home to you. And they'll bring their 14 kids and the other eleven members of their extended family.

Won't that be nice? 


Friday, March 3, 2023

Painful Realities

 











The pain some will feel over this in their delicate bits will cease the moment they cease squatting on their own spurs.

Wednesday, December 7, 2022

And Now A Word From The Sponsors

 h/t WRSA


Elections have consequences. Especially fake ones.

Wednesday, August 31, 2022

Behold, Emperor Stumblefuck Poopypants, At His Most Articulate


In any Emergency Department in the country, he wouldn't be deemed competent to make basic medical decisions for himself, and would be detained for a psychiatric evaluation as gravely disabled. He doesn't have sufficient orientation to be allowed to wander freely in society, and would be locked up for his own good.

Not even twenty months into his fraudulent regime, and his functional incompetence and senility is far too big to hide or ignore, and is plainly visible 8000 miles away. And if they're seeing it this clearly in Sydney, it's long since been noted in Moscow, Beijing, Pyongyang, and Teheran.


The far scarier question that follows:

What cabal of unelected behind-the-curtains coup-masters are actually running the United States' executive branch, including the DoJ and the armed farces?

This pants-shitting fucktard can't even run a lawnmower, and any federal agency that refused to do anything he said would be on firm legal grounds due to his basic mental incompetence.

And clearly, his minions and their house-organ media buddies have decided that since they pulled off one coup with the 2020 fake election, another ongoing one now is simply child's play.

This is the point in world affairs where DefCon levels take on an algorithm of their own, as sphincters pucker up in nearly a dozen important places.

You're about to see what happens when the cabinet invokes the 25th amendment, because if they don't do it soon, come January 1st, a republican Congress is going to impeach him, and then prosecute the rest of this administration for an ongoing coup d'etat, and they're going to be absolutely correct to do so.

Which means the next Speaker of the House is overwhelmingly likely to be the next President of the United States, after the sitting veep is disqualified for conspiracy and complicity in the ongoing shitshow of elder abuse in this administration.

And after that, the REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! level nationwide will shatter the polar icecap on Mars, and 10:1 the range goes hot in both directions. Compared to this building tsunami, Watergate was a fart in the bathtub.

Plan accordingly.


Really, butthurt Goolag censors? Noticing Poopypants' obvious senile dementia, which Stevie Wonder can see from space, is what finally caused you to strangle this blog, and erase visits in real time???

All you're doing is confirming the truth of the assessment, and telling me where your open nerves are.

Expect Biden dementia stories to become daily from here on out.

Thursday, June 16, 2022

Beware Of Falling Stockbrokers

 Tam FTW:












And now, an appropriate chorus:


Why Bob Dylan, Bocephus, or Willy Nelson haven't covered this song is a mystery for the ages.

Saturday, December 18, 2021

Oops...!

 














Just Like We've Told You All Along Department:

Turns out PropTwat, Hannah Gutierrez-Reed, future felon for manslaughter on Rust, comes by her ineptitude and total incompetence naturally, as the stories flow in from her prior gig, on The Old Way with Nicolas Cage.

(Getarope News)'You just blew my f**king eardrums out!' Rust armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed 'discharged weapons without warning and infuriated star Nicolas Cage' on her previous film

  • Hannah Gutierrez-Reed was the subject of numerous complaints while working as the armorer on her previous, and first ever, movie The Old Way
  • Nicolas Cage, the star of the film, reportedly yelled at her after she fired a gun without warning for the second time: 'You just blew my f**king eardrums out!'
  • A crew member from the The Old Way said she 'put the cast and crew in several unnecessary and dangerous situations'  before he reported she should be fired
  • In a podcast interview after filming ended, she said she wasn't sure if she was ready to be a head armorer on a movie set
  • Two production sources claim Rust armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed previously gave a child actor a gun without checking it on set of the The Old Way film
  • The rookie armorer was named as the person who loaded Alec Baldwin's prop gun that killed cinematographer Halyna Gutierrez-Reed on the set of Rust 

Word To Your Lawyer, PropTwat:

End the farce. Cut a deal and plead out, while you still have a shot at some leniency for killing someone. You'll be out in 12-18 months, tops, and thankfully, never be legally allowed to touch a firearm the rest of your adult life, which will save as many lives as a cancer cure at this point, based solely on your demonstrated performance on one and a half movies.

So, total shocker, untrained and incompetent non-union PropTwat was a walking disaster with weaponry, and only by some miracle took until her second movie gig to kill someone, in a way no one has done in Hollywood in...lemme see, carry the zero...ever. (Neither Brandon Lee nor John Eric Hexum were killed by live rounds on set. Gutierrez-Reed is thus the only propmaster/armorer in recorded cinematic history, AFAIK, to screw that pooch right out of the gate, and managed it on her sophomore film, which was yet another low-budget piece of crap.)

RTWT

And for those spring-loaded to the stupid position, there were multiple producers on Rust, and she wasn't hired by Baldwin (who had no such hire/fire authority), but rather by line producer Gabrielle Pickle (who has a documented history of firing camera crews when they complained that safety corners were being cut), and/or by Unit Production Manager Katherine Walters.

The locus of stupid on this disastrous film aren't Hollywood people at all, but in fact a bunch of cut-rate indy film bumpkins from Georgia, trying to do everything on the cheap, and think of themselves as scrappy, but are in fact crappy, right up until they killed someone. These cheapskates are working overtime to live up to ever stereotype about producers that exists, and bringing them to life before your very eyes. Wannabes will get you killed every time, even in movie-making.

Gutierrez-Reed, total newb to guns, and yet serial fuck-up armorer

Dave Halls, 2d AD, the guy supposedly double-checking Guttierez-Reed, and previously caught violating weapon safety rules on another production (and as a member of the production department, not the prop department, he should never have anything to do with weapons on any set, yet here he was screwing that pooch again too)

Gabrielle Pickle, line producer, already found guilty of violating federal labor laws for firing a previous camera crew on another production when they complained about unsafe practices on-set 

This movie was being made by a complete rogue's gallery of incompetent assholes, and for the motion picture budget equivalent of peanuts.

"When you pay peanuts, you get monkeys." - Aesop 

QED






*{Hot tip, kids, when I use "non-union" derogatorily in the context of movie and TV productions, that's because it's true. I was dragged, kicking and screaming, into two unions over two decades in Hollyweird film production. The point isn't, as you imagine, because union membership confers infallibility. Anything but. As an elected officer and member of my union's executive board, we spent 90% of our time on the 5% of our union members who were nonetheless stone-cold f**k-ups. The point, in Hollywood, is that getting union membership for behind-the-scenes crafts and guilds is that it takes 30 days working on either a union show, or non-union show that organizes, to get it. And getting that, usually takes 1-3 years, on average, meaning no one on a union show with their shiny paid-up AFL-CIO card is a freaking incompetent rookie, because they'd never last. Hannah Gutierrez-Reed never got those 30 days, nor 1-3 years, nor took the week's worth of mandatory union classes the producers - that would be Universal, Fox, Warner Brothers, Paramount, Disney, Sony, et al - require before you can be in your job. Which, in Gutierrez-Reed's case, would have included not just general set safety classes, but for propmasters and armorers, she would have had an entire class devoted solely and entirely to firearms and ammunition safety. She would have had to pass at least a basic test, before being allowed near any set, to do the sort of f**k-ups she did on both of the one and a half movies she worked on, right up until her multi-incompetence manifested itself in killing someone - by deliberately violating 50 or 60 of the most basic on-set rules for the job for which she was hired, after representing herself as an expert, rather than a farking novice and junior moron, which is what she was and is. A non-union member in Hollywood is one step above an absolute rookie level moron, whereas anyone with a union membership card has at least enough acquaintance with their job to not do anything as stupid as the plethora of screw-ups she pulled off, let alone killing people. Which exact lack is why she took on too much job, for too little money, with too few brains, and committed career-ending manslaughter. People on set sound like the kid in The Sandlot - "You're killing me, Smalls!" , and they say that to their co-workers all the time, usually jokingly, for making their job harder. When they say that to Gutierrez-Reed, they mean it literally.}

Tuesday, December 14, 2021

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

h/t I Hate The Media 










(Reality's Bitchslap) 'The situation is dire'; Salvation Army facing toy, donation shortage ahead of holidays'

 Get Woke, Go Broke.

When the @$$tards running that lash-up publicly fires outright every single one of their communist knuckleheads who wrote, greenlighted, and/or promulgated their idiotic White Guilt Apology Manual, get down on their knees and beg forgiveness from the entire white world for ever uttering it, and unconditionally repudiate the entire socialist woketard doctrine as Satanic evil, entirely inconsistent with Christianity, maybe they'll see another cent from me.

Not one minute sooner.




















BTW: If anyone thinks they've rescinded their original documents, no such thing is so.
They pulled only the original pamphlet, but the Commie Progtard Study Guide On Racism is still exactly where it was left, by the same Woketard minions who brought out the retail version.

UPDATE: Great Response Letter. Heartily approve. I'm still dropping skidmarked TP in their buckets, nonetheless. Or, you can print these up, and drop them off around town as you see fit.