Tuesday, June 21, 2022

Dungball Review: Without Remorse

h/t Pergelator

Pergelator liked this flick. Well, it's a free country. And we hate to harsh anyone's mellow, but...

Equal time for an opposing view: 

Au contraire.

Based on a Tom Clancy story, which isn't the same thing at all.

It's Hollywood-speak for "fornicated the original story up past 11, and all the way to FUBAR." Which, as is tediously predictable, they did.

Anyone who read the original book probably shot their TV screen to pieces by 10 minutes into this craptastic bastardization of Clancy's story.

The flick wasn't shot before a live audience, but the writers, producers, and director - oh, and even Jeff Bezos, CEO of flick-producer Amazon - of this steaming pile of feces definitely should be.

Garbage reworking of his stuff was why, after the third horrible re-write out of four movies, Clancy vowed they'd never get another one of his books to ruin, unless it was over his dead body.

Well, he died in 2013.

So, here's what you get.

If one never read the source novel, from which they lifted the main character's name, and the title, before they burned everything else in a fire, take Clancy's name off this, as should be done, and try to sell it otherwise, and it's nothing but a D- piece of straight to low-budget cable and Albanian distribution dungball movie. It's Cheeze Whiz on a cracker pretending to be caviar.

Without Remorse mainly refers to the way the authors of this cinematic pantload took a crap on Clancy's work and legacy.

At that, it succeeds beyond their wildest expectations.

If somebody gives this to you for free, give it back. You'll be happier, and it's 20 bucks (had you bought it), and 109 minutes of your life you won't have wasted. If you can't turn it down, take it to the skeet range, and glue it to a clay pigeon. Best use of it I can think of.

Our Rating: Watching this movie is like licking your dog's butt. Just less fun for your dog.


Ironwolf32 said...

It is the same thing that they did with the Wheel of Time series. It is terrible. No one involved with the series read the book.

In fact, I would go one step further... the writers of the series have such arrogance that they felt they could write a better version of Robert Jordan's story.

Anonymous said...

My favorite novel as a teen.

Waited patiently (for decades) for the movie.

Turned it off after eight minutes.

Survivormann99 said...

OMG! What crap this movie was. I saw it several months ago when it first came out. As they say, "Time heals all wounds," so many of the horrid details have faded from my memory.

Yet, I remember the SEAL team leader, a black, female Lesbian. AS IF a woman would be a SEAL, much less a team leader today. Even black male SEALS are scarce. (I suppose it's that whole swimming thing.)

Curious about her, I looked the actress up. At that time, her next role, which was in a movie in post-production, involved her portraying Ann Boleyn. OMG! Anne Boleyn? AS IF a black Lesbian...

Anonymous said...

Yeap, it sucked

Unknown said...

LOL - having not read the book I can only agree that it was typical action movie fair with nothing more memorable about it than other typical action movie stuff. Typical anti-hero stuff. Liked the Thomas Jane "The Punisher" more.

Bear Claw Chris Lapp said...

After seconds click went the channel changer. The book was fantastic when I read it and most of his books years ago. The real story in the book would make a hell of a movie that could never be made, back then as well as now..Real life coverage soon upon us but we won't see a lot of that on network nooos as well, not that I even watch network lose.

Rocketguy said...

As others have stated - loved the book and got all excited to see they were making a movie. I’m glad I read initial reviews before watching it or I would have lost my mind. What a wasted opportunity.

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen this particular monstrosity, but if Hollywood screwed this up as much as they did Heinlein's "Starship Troopers", then I don't ever want to...

John the River said...

Even Clancy's books went downhill after his divorce. He got some cowriters, did little writing on the new books, cashed the checks. I missed getting and reading a new Tom Clancy every year or so.

Mike-SMO said...

Script approval can be written into contracts, but from what I have seen, that is deadly, dreary business. Once control passes to an estate, money talks. A bigger "slice", After market sales of junk, eliminated work of script review, etc usually calm an upset stomach. That is how they got Tolkien. Now, you can even buy a real Hobbit ring.

Authors don't write for the camera. Script writers look for excuses to add explosions and exposed female anatomy for the camera. Learn to read.

Landroll said...

Haven't read the book. Don't know why. Certainly will miss the movie. Spit coffee all over the keyboard with your last line, "like liking a dog's butt. But less fun for the dog." I'm stealing that line.

John Wilder said...

Buddy warned me off of this when it came out. I'm glad I'd forgotten about it.

Don Rasmussen said...

God Almighty I am Go FOR LAUNCH! Talk about fucking up a glass of water! Hopefully Tom is in Heaven just shaking his head at this NIGGRIFIED cinematic plate of Hot Liquid Dogshit. Who plays Jack Ryan in the next one?... Whoopi? Latifa? Who is NO ROBERT[a] McCALL, BTW. This kind of High-Pressure Sprayed Diarrhea (HPSD) is what helps me invent newer, better swearwords. Honestly, this and the latest 007 are all it should take to torpedo Holeywood once and for all.

Linda Fox said...

I call this one The Revenge of the 2nd Wife.

Yeah, she - apparently - was greedy (how the hell much money can you spend in a lifetime, even with an ex-wife?).

Clark was a burned-out guy, who had an encounter with a young woman, who was taken out by some human trafficers. Those guys picked on the WRONG old guy, who made them wish they had left him and the girl alone.

After that, he went on to other things - and, also found a more mature love, kids, and even a young guy - former gang member redeemed by military service - to mentor (and, eventually, allow to marry his daughter).

Great story line over multiple books. But, one of those very tough old White Dudes. Not a Black Guy, who comes in with a different dynamic. No disrespect to the actor, but aside from his cultural heritage, he's too young, and unscarred.

John the River said...

Because it by Amazon Video/Films I'm not going to bother with:
Without Remorse.
Lord of the Rings, The Series.
Foundation, The Series.
Jack Ryan, The Series.

All original stories that I loved and read and reread. I actually watched about twenty minutes of Jack Ryan, now I know better.
Reacher is the only exception, it hasn't totally S***... so far.

rickr said...

Totally agree on how the money masters have screwed Tom Clancy in the grave. All of his stories have been told FAR better by his novels than any of the faux film/TV productions. And these new 'Tom Clancy" books? Pffffft.

Like Anonymous, I enjoyed Without Remorse (the novel) most among the REAL Clancy works, and I had even less tolerance for Amazon's butchery than he did.