Thursday, February 16, 2023

Another Day, Another Defenestration


As the Russian bureaucracy devolves into a life-imitates-art and much-less-funny Monty Python sketch, news today that another Putin-linked top Russian defense official has died of Failure To Fly, this time in St. Peterburg.


Marina Yankina, aged 58, Head of Financial Supply of Russia's Western Military District (which includes most of Russia's border with Ukraine), had gone from ordinary worker to head of her department in only the last five years, before suddenly deciding to take an impromptu flying lesson from 160' up. Various sources have claimed a number of excuses for her last flight, none of which, miraculously, seem to include the FSB pushing her out the window. Why she chose to open the window on a balmy 28° degree F. day, when there were perfectly good busses and trains to step in front of on the ground at street level, remains a mystery.

Russia hasn't had this many people from the Defense Ministry crash to earth in a year since Khrushchev ran their space program. But what the hey, any major country could have 10, 15, or even 20 defense officials all fall out of windows in any one year span, amirite? It's just bad luck.

Whatever the reasons for her plunge, yet again, while the worst place to be for Russians is in an army trench on the Ukraine front, the second worst casualty rate continues to be suffered by anyone in Putin's defense establishment.

At least if they all moved to the ground floor, they could commit suicide the old-fashioned way in Russia: seven or ten bullets to the back of the head, or toasting bread with an electric toaster while taking a hot bath.


UPDATE: Per comments below, this was possibly because someone grifted 70% of the funds for the AA defense forces in that district. Regardless of whether Yankina tried to fly to Neverneverland because she was a co-conspirator, or a whistleblower, the main point is still this: 70% of the funds allocated to equip AA forces in the Western Military District (the district supplying the bulk of the fighting forces in this year-long military debacle) didn't get where it was intended, and never made it to the pointy end of the stick for air and missile defense. Which may explain the randomly exploding bits and bobs throughout Russia proper for some months, going back to last spring. Perhaps it also explains the spectacularly underwhelming performance Vlad's drunken bumpkins have put on for the world since last February if Peter and Paul had to be robbed, and they've run out of other people's money to prosecute this invasion "Special Military Operation". And maybe even helps explain the perpetual delays in the as-yet-to-be-unleashed, someday, possibly, maybe Russian Summer Fall Winter (Spring?) Counter-Offensive, if they keep having to send more money, because the Russian stagecoaches keep turning up robbed before they arrive at the fort.

One can but hope no one sends any mystery balloons over Russia; might be that no one would notice. Bummer.

Time for a popcorn and soda run.

But hey: Massive byzantine corruption and graft? In RUSSIA?!? Who knew???

17 comments:

Bear Claw Chris Lapp said...

No it was Wilkens check the pronoun.

Joe in PNG said...

That's how the Allies won WWII, innit?

Mike -SMO said...

Hard to tell. Maybe she didn't plan for an escape with her loot or maybe she underestimated how dangerous cornered grifters can be. In Russia, it doesn't seem to matter. Someone is always flying out a window.

irontomflint said...

...since Khrushchev ran their space program.
Hahaha I see what you did there!

The Freeholder said...

If she was in "Financial Supply", I think we can all make a reasonable guess why she was taking flight lessons.

Glen Filthie said...

Oh please. Aesop, you f-tard, if you’re trying to smear Putler… at least try to do a decent job of it?

Why… the thought of Justin Trudeau committing suicide with seven shots from a Bostitch nail gun through the knee caps and another through the back of the head? It warms the soul! Wouldn’t it be great if Bitch McConnell was accidentally fired out of a cannon? I’m tellin ya - if your pedo president died screaming in a firebombed car… I’d go down to the bar and buy a round for the house! We need a leader like Putler here!
😊👍

Like it or not…Putler gets things done, and he knows how to deal with fools who’ve outlived their usefulness!

Anonymous said...

Have to say, wish we had some of this in DC with failure of Top Men and Women.

John Wilder said...

Ahhh, the Russian Way - some things never change.

Anonymous said...

Rumors published by ISW:

The Western Military District Financial Department head Marina Yarinka reportedly fell out of a window and died on February 16.[65] A prominent Russian milblogger amplified claims that Yarinka’s mysterious death could be related to an April 2022 report that supposedly alleged that unspecified actors stole 70 percent of the funds allocated for the modernization of air and missile defense near St. Petersburg.

70%? I wonder who she was about to name?

RD

Aesop said...

@Glen,

The only smear was Yankina, all over the pavement 16 stories below her window.
And like Epstein, she didn't kill herself.
Putard has a long and distinguished history, as befits a lifelong KGB thug, of dispatching troublemakers with finality, both at home and abroad.
Yankina either helped embezzle funds, or more likely, was about to blow the whistle on those who did. Which, 100:1, included Dear Leader himself ("90% to the Big weΦ").
He's already got 3x the personal body count of the Clinton Family Crime Syndicate, but then he's been at it 3x as long.
Nice of you to admit all that, despite your bluster and buffoonery.

markshere2 said...

OOOOh Buffoonery!!!


I love seeing words I coined (stole?) long ago coming into common usage.


" because the Russian stagecoaches keep turning up robbed before they arrive at the fort."

Wotta turn of phrase!!

Yer command of the american language continues to enhance my happiness. THANKS!

James said...

And China's bureaucracy makes Russia's look squeaky clean. Don't know that Taiwan is really in that much danger.

Winterborn said...

Loved the colonel who "Shot him self 5 times in the chest" in the bosses office.

Saw Zeihan on Joe Rogan show, where he said something like 1/3 of the Russian defense budget was straight graft and 1/3rd was hidden graft. Kinda wondering how spot on he is with that.

Not the worst suicide I've heard of but here is article on that "suicide." https://nypost.com/2022/11/30/russian-colonel-vadim-boiko-killed-himself-at-boss-desk/

Skyler the Weird said...

Occasional Defenestration of Government Officials is good for Society. Defenestration of Communists saved Chile.

Joe in PNG said...

Russian graft is as old as the House of Romanov. Doesn't matter what you call the Russian elite- Boyars, Autocrats, Commissars, Nomenklatura, or Oligarchs- if there's money, they're going to take all they can get.

There's a reason that Russia tends to historically suck hard at the whole 'put their military into actual action' thing.

Tucanae Services said...

Aesop,

Little ground truth having lived in RU for several years. Much of the housing and offices use central boilers, hence the occupants have no control of the amount of BTUs entering the compartment. You can be sitting in a Siberian winter storm and see the windows cracked open to cool the flat down.

As to her 'flight'. She fared better than those Kiwis a couple of days back. She arrived at her intended destination -- the sidewalk.

Anonymous said...

Would that we'd have some fliers from the E-ring of the Pentagon. I could name dozens of candidates.
Boat Guy