Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Slow Learners

h/t Ol' Remus
After the Shrillary uniform suggestions became moot,
the Army is taking a new approach...

We admit to bagging on the Big Green Army hereabouts from time to time, but only because, like a kid in school from the short bus, they come in the schoolhouse door with a "Kick Me" sign pinned to their knapsack, and their tongue tracks are still wet on sticky inside the busses' windows. (And anyways, it's our retarded family we're talking about.)

And while they can't seem to prosecute so much as one communist 2d LT, properly sentence one treasonous traitor, or hold the line on standards for Rangers or SF in the face of underwhelming Amazon Barbies, they've finally leveraged admitting transgendered Rainbow Warrior snappy dressers to their ranks by the pink busload into something that may actually benefit the entire force:

Fifty years late, they've finally recognized their mistake in going to bus driver uniforms, and will be returning to the WWII-era "pinks-and-greens" style of dress uniform.

Good enough for Grams and Grandpa; good enough for today.
I hear they're even adding the missing waist belt, too. Good call.

While we, and any few millions are both familiar with the famous "Two Armies" quote of Jean Lartéguy, and would of course choose the second army he mentioned in preference to the first, unlike our baby brother we managed to serve in one that has accomplished both missions with equal measures of ferocity and style for a couple of centuries or so.

So it's nice to see Big Green, two generations later, admitting they stepped on their wedding tackle forcefully (and ground the cleats in), and finally making the effort to untangle themselves, and stop embarrassing legions of warriors with uniforms that looked like they came from the Acme Janitorial Uniform Company in Piscataway, NJ. The change is due in no small part to 60 years worth of serving troops telling them they'd screwed the pooch, and at last, the Army is listening, after first exhausting all other options.

As long as they don't go full monty, and literally adopt hot pink in "pinks and greens", we applaud the service for finally getting their crap together, and for bonus points, not looking like the Air Farce, which as the sole remaining branch sporting abysmal style, might consider a return to the fashion sense from back when their leaders were named Spaatz and Arnold, and their minions didn't look like doormen, bellhops, and nightclub waiters.

Seriously, doggies, nice work on the uniforms. Like the story of Androcles should have taught you, it only hurts until you pull the thorn out of your paw.

It's a small change, but perhaps if the ranks of a given service start to look like warriors instead of waiters, they'll grow a spine, find a pair, and return to behaving like warriors.

It's still the Army, but it could happen.

It might even start a trend: they've got a decent shot to win on Saturday. (shudder)
Go Navy! Beat Army!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

My Father and Uncles served in the "brown shoe" Army. Bout damn time they abandoned the most recent travesty of going back to the War Against The States uniform.
I read an account of one of the actors from "Band of Brothers" wearing his WWII OD uniform to Heathrow to pick up the guy he was portraying and getting relentlessly hit on.
Boat Guy