As the Russian bureaucracy devolves into a life-imitates-art and much-less-funny Monty Python sketch, news today that another Putin-linked top Russian defense official has died of Failure To Fly, this time in St. Peterburg.
Marina Yankina, aged 58, Head of Financial Supply of Russia's Western Military District (which includes most of Russia's border with Ukraine), had gone from ordinary worker to head of her department in only the last five years, before suddenly deciding to take an impromptu flying lesson from 160' up. Various sources have claimed a number of excuses for her last flight, none of which, miraculously, seem to include the FSB pushing her out the window. Why she chose to open the window on a balmy 28° degree F. day, when there were perfectly good busses and trains to step in front of on the ground at street level, remains a mystery.
Russia hasn't had this many people from the Defense Ministry crash to earth in a year since Khrushchev ran their space program. But what the hey, any major country could have 10, 15, or even 20 defense officials all fall out of windows in any one year span, amirite? It's just bad luck.
Whatever the reasons for her plunge, yet again, while the worst place to be for Russians is in an army trench on the Ukraine front, the second worst casualty rate continues to be suffered by anyone in Putin's defense establishment.
At least if they all moved to the ground floor, they could commit suicide the old-fashioned way in Russia: seven or ten bullets to the back of the head, or toasting bread with an electric toaster while taking a hot bath.
UPDATE: Per comments below, this was possibly because someone grifted 70% of the funds for the AA defense forces in that district. Regardless of whether Yankina tried to fly to Neverneverland because she was a co-conspirator, or a whistleblower, the main point is still this: 70% of the funds allocated to equip AA forces in the Western Military District (the district supplying the bulk of the fighting forces in this year-long military debacle) didn't get where it was intended, and never made it to the pointy end of the stick for air and missile defense. Which may explain the randomly exploding bits and bobs throughout Russia proper for some months, going back to last spring. Perhaps it also explains the spectacularly underwhelming performance Vlad's drunken bumpkins have put on for the world since last February if Peter and Paul had to be robbed, and they've run out of other people's money to prosecute this invasion "Special Military Operation". And maybe even helps explain the perpetual delays in the as-yet-to-be-unleashed, someday, possibly, maybe Russian Summer Fall Winter (Spring?) Counter-Offensive, if they keep having to send more money, because the Russian stagecoaches keep turning up robbed before they arrive at the fort.
One can but hope no one sends any mystery balloons over Russia; might be that no one would notice. Bummer.
Time for a popcorn and soda run.
But hey: Massive byzantine corruption and graft? In RUSSIA?!? Who knew???
