Here's A Better SOTU

h/t Daily Timewaster

A picture worth 1000 words, and impossible to rebut.

All you NeverTrumpers out there, give us a holler when you get tired of winning.

Sabo: Prank Demigod

Oh, yes it is!

Here's your order of Mad Maxine's @$$ on a platter. With a side of collateral damage.

Gold Medal To Oz At The Olympics

An Australian citizen from Melbourne named Howard, whose current gig is a strikingly accurate impersonation of Dear Leader/repressive thug Kim Jong Un of Norkistan, jumped in front of the Norkish cheerleaders at their hockey game against Japan, dancing, posing, and waving flags.

Any time they're out of sight of the motherland, every Nork in existence has a group of minder-thugs, the sort of guys whose demeanor makes the old KGB seem like Denny's hostesses by comparison.

So with this expert troll, Howard got exactly the response he was hoping for: the Nork security goons manhandled, kicked, and bum-rushed him RTFO, and then the South Koreans' security, eager to eliminate a world-wide televised incident (too late!), completed the game by tossing him completely out of the Olympics. And now it's world-wide. (Cue the Streisand Effect). Well-played.

"I'm a satirist. You can't let North Korea hijack these games using their cheerleaders; we've got to remind people that it's a terrible regime." Howard said, in a Melbourne accent of homegrown 'Strine worthy of Mick Dundee,on-air in an Oz TV interview afterwards.

Gold medal, right there. Gets it, and travelled 5000 miles just to stick it to the regime.

Though he deserves one, Oz authorities can't give him one of these; only the IOOC can do that.

But if the government ministries Down Under have a pair down under, the guy should find himself on the list of the Governor-General of the Commonwealth's Queen's Birthday Honors this June, for an award of Member of the Order of Australia, for meritorious service to the cause of freedom.

That'd be fair dinkum. He earned it.
Good on ya, mate!

 

 

You Magnificent Bastards!

h/t Kenny at Knuckledraggin...

BIRMINGHAM, AL,  (WKRG) — A Muslim civil rights organization is asking management at a McDonald’s located in Decatur, Alabama to identify and fire the staff who allegedly hid pieces of bacon in 14 chicken sandwiches ordered by a Muslim family.

1) If you work at MickeyD's you probably shouldn't oughta do that.

2) Given that this complaint issues from the Perpetually Offended, I doubt anyone actually did it; I suspect the chance it's a shakedown scam is about a 100% certainty.
(That'd be 1:1 odds for public school grads.)

3) I'm not an imam, but I'm pretty sure McDonald's isn't halal to begin with, since they prepare and cook the pork products right next to the beef products. Which once again reinforces my suspicion this is nothing but BS, in pursuit of a rent check.

4) But if someone did actually pull off the Great Birmingham Bacon Caper, STFU, eh?

5) And if you did do it, Real American Genius:

If I were that manager, I'm pretty sure I'd pin this act on Seaman Hornsby:

Salamat!