h/t WRSA
Apologies for leaving it so long, but we've been laboriously explaining to anyone with the wits to think it through in comments elsewhere why Ukraine is far less about Ukraine, and far more about two things: US credibility internationally, and the survival of nuclear non-proliferation as a central national and international policy.
We haven't posted that opus here (yet) due to some personal issues, but before the week has ended, POTUS has just validated both our reasons, and underlined them with a scarlet red highlighter, and then lit off skyrockets in case anyone wasn't paying attention.
We'll get to why last week's debacle in the Oval Office with Zelensky wasn't the win for Trump and Vance the people on the left half of the IQ bell curve think it was, but the above screenshot from Vox, courtesy of WRSA, has just made all our arguments for us.
For Common Core grads, we protect Japan militarily because
A) we get bases there that make responding to problems in Korea easier, as well as for making overflights of anywhere in a fan from Siberia to Southeast Asia far more logistically simple, and
B) because the last time Japan was fully in charge of its own military, it took 14 years of war culminating in the only two planned releases of SPF 30,000 Canned Sunshine in world history, to date, to bring it to a close.
B) is the rather more important reason, and the most germane one starting in late 1945.
Y'see, there were a wee few nations who had seen what the Japanese could accomplish when they coupled zen-like concentration behind unstoppable industrialization, in service of a militaristic code of conduct that made the Spartans look like pussies.
The following nation-states might have a wee objection or two to Japan's military urges unbridled, purely on the basis of first-hand experience with them the last time around:
Russia
China (including - or also - Taiwan)
Mongolia
Korea (both halves)
The Philippines
Australia
New Zealand
Britain
France
India
Singapore
Vietnam
Indonesia
Brunei
Burma
uncounted (I'm frankly too damned lazy at the moment) South Pacific island-nations
Oh, and of course, US. Which handily means the U.S.
IOW, every nation in that hemisphere, a number not in it any longer, and no less than (counts fingers) seven nuclear powers. Which is every one there is except Israel and Pakistan. (So far.)
And hey, Japan doesn't depend on imports anymore, especially oil, like they did before 1940. O wait, that hasn't changed. And Japan isn't xenophobic, regarding other countries' citizenry as lesser mortals. O wait, that hasn't changed. And the Japanese have forgiven us for Hiroshima, and don't hold a grudge, having fully embraced the atrocities they committed and vowing to never, ever want to do anything like that again. O wait, that hasn't happened either, and they still suffer from the Japanese version of Waldheimer Syndrome, where they can't remember anything that happened before 1945. And consequently, Korea (both halves), China, and the Philippines' population doesn't hate Japan and anything Japanese. Except for their living pulsing guts. (Remarkably like Ukrainians feel about Russians, and for just about the exact same reasons, btw.)
So yeah, Mr. President, you go on and make Japan totally responsible for defending itself. Get them to throw us out of those bases, and then take the 0.2 seconds it'll take them to decide to change their national constitution, withdraw from the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, and then spend about 15 minutes that it'll take them to start building nuclear weapons.
China's getting frisky, Russia still hasn't settled a century-old dispute about islands to the north of Japan, and Crazy Kim keeps launching nuclear-capable missiles over their way, so they'd be crazy not to build nukes. And with their national ability, resources, and the will to do it, it'll take them probably until about lunchtime next Wednesday before they test one that works. (Maybe over Pyongyang, if they have a sense of humor.)
So now South Korea's going to want some too.
So is Taiwan.
And Singapore.
And Oz and the Kiwis will do some soul-searching. Odds are, Oz says yes, and the Kiwis wet their pants and start teaching Japanese in primary school, but I could be wrong there.
And all of them could probably accomplish a nuclear arsenal within the year.
Less if they find a willing seller.
The Philippines and Indonesia will want some too. Pakistan would be too glad to help them out, in exchange for the southern Philippines going Muslim separatist. (You can tell where worldwide Catholicism and Muslim expansion met by looking at the religion demographics of the various Philippine Islands. Hint: Our first clash with militant Islam was the Barbary pirates just after the dawn of the 1800s. The second was when we inherited the Philippine Islands from Spain after 1898.)
And, what the hell, what could go wrong with six new nuclear powers - seven, counting Japan - in the eastern Pacific, including two more nuclear Muslim or Muslim-leaning countries? Muslim countries always get along with everyone, amirite??
Sweetness and light, in exchange for Trump saving the US another $50 or so.
Genius.
Then Japan realizes that in many cases, their interests don't really align with US interests.
So now we've got China and Japan looking to challenge the U.S. geopolitically in the Eastern Pacific. Greaaaaaaaaaaaaat. BRILLIANT!
It's not like we ever fought a war with Japan over that sort of thing, right?
And then maybe those other nations decide we're probably going to drop them like a hot potato the minute it's expedient, just like we're looking to do with Ukraine now.
U.S.: "O No! Not you (South Korea/Taiwan/Philippines/Australia/New Zealand)! We'd never backstab you like we just did Ukraine! You're our special friends."
Them: "Sh'yeah, right, you lying sacks of American shit. Pull the other one; it's got bells on it. Go fuck yourselves, and get the hell out of our country while you're up."
Fucking Brilliant!!!!
We'll re-fight WWII in the Pacific with mostly the same players, because territorial and imperial ambitions haven't gone away, and neither have centuries-old squabbles, only this time, Oprah-like, "You get a nuke, You get a nuke...EVERYONE gets nukes!!!" Except this time, pretty much no one else is on our side, and all that trade Trump thinks will be happening will be divided amongst other nations, with other currencies, and we'll be hoping for table scraps. Imagine how much we'll save on a navy when we can't find willing buyers for anything we've got to sell anywhere beyond Honolulu.
Cue the Happy Dance!
Look what we'll save ourselves into.
That'll be so much cheaper in the long run than sucking it up, shutting up, and keeping Japan out of the militarism and nuclear weapon business.
Pretty much for the same reason we waited until an entire generation died in Germany to breed the urge to invade France out of those @$$holes.
And, while we're up, word to your mother: All the hardware we sold to Japan, the front-line stuff? Their versions aren't sales, they're made by Japan, under license.
What does that mean?
Well, please list the Japanese products - hardware and software - they didn't get from us, improve, turn around, and kick our asses with.
We'll wait.
Tell us whether Toyota or Chrysler makes better cars these days.
Tell us how many TVs we make here anymore (Common Core grads: that would be zero). Or video players. Or computers.
Hell, if it wasn't for Hollywood making the actual product, the entire movie business would be Japanese right now. With China bootlegging the content, and Japan, Korea, and Vietnam making the hardware, it's barely ours anymore anyhow.
So let's, by all means, do for the military in Japan what we've done for the electronics and automobile industries. What could possibly go wrong?
So for the love of Christ, somebody, ANYBODY, kindly tackle POTUS, sit him down in the Situation Room, and explain to him, with lots of pictures and a 2x4 if necessary, that not every government expenditure is better if we cut it completely, and that there are reasons for doing some of the things he never learned about before this week.
You want to talk about trimming US expenditures, and getting Japan to pony up a bit more, just like we wish NATO would do?
Okay, fine.
Just think long and hard about what happens if they say "Fuck you. You need us more than we need you."
Like they will.
And for those of you waaaaaay over on the left end of the IQ curve, who are still sounding out some of what we wrote, write this lesson on your hands with a Sharpie:
Nations do NOT have "friends".
They have INTERESTS.
Then, in the file folder marked "No Shit, Sherlock", put in an index card that notes that a friendly, allied, minimally militarized and totally non-nuclear armed Japan is in OURS.
If you need audio-visual aids, because reading is hard, or because everything that happened before you were born is lumped in with trench warfare, dinosaurs, and the Crusades, we can recommend a couple of dozen absolutely spiffy explanations to explain the finer points to you, courtesy of Warner Brothers, Universal, Columbia, Fox, Republic, and Paramount, etc. until the penny finally drops for you, or you can manage history books without pictures:
Then imagine doing it all over x10, except suddenly it all looks like the horror section of The Day After, playing on an endless loop.
