Dumber Than A Bag Of Hammers

h/t Miguel

I call it the Air Farce for cause, although it remains an honorable alternative to service in any actual military organization.

But until I saw this pic, I didn't realize they had opened the ranks to people with IQs below 50 for anyone below the rank of general.

Apparently, you get to be a Senior Airman these days if you don't wear your underpants outside your trousers, and don't put your shoes and socks on in that order. And I'm not that sure about the shoes and socks test, based on this pic.

I have it on good authority that the retarded kid from the Special Olympics "arguing on the internet" meme even facepalmed upon seeing this pic.

The only thought that cheers me up is that if the average IQ in the USAF is 100+, think of how many people (20-50 at minimum) they must have recruited with Einstein-level 210 IQs to balance out this total moron's negative GT score.

Beware The Ancient Booer

 

This happens in real life as well as fairytales:

That rousing, robust, and richly-deserved damnation of the Shithead in Chief, by the mother of one of his most recent victims, should ring in his ears until he dies, hopefully while being buried alive by the mob, with dirt shoveled onto his still blinking eyes, until the weight of his crimes is equaled by the weight of the earth upon his chest that suffocates the miserable life out of him.

h/t Odd Job

There's another picture you probably saw this week. But it wasn't finished, as given.

Allow us to add the proper finishing touches:

Rest assured his trousers have matching racing stripes of cowardice, except those run down the insides of the legs.

Why So Clueless?

Somebody Impanel A Jury, And Start Looking For A Stout Oak Tree

h/t The Old Jarhead

And Dumbocrats were ready to ditch Dopey Gropey Joe, and try to nominate this @$$clown??

(NYFC) Gov. Andrew Cuomo [D-Five Families] has finally admitted — tacitly and partially, anyway — the mistake that was state health chief Howard Zucker’s order that nursing homes must admit coronavirus-positive patients.
On Sunday, Cuomo announced a new regulation: Such patients must now test negative for the virus before hospitals can return them to nursing homes. Yet the gov also admitted that COVID-19 cases might still go to the facilities via other routes, and didn’t explicitly overrule Zucker’s March 25 mandate that homes must accept people despite their testing status — indeed, couldn’t even require a test pre-admission.

Make that murderous @$$clown. 

Tiptoeing quietly away from the scene of the crime, especially after revelations that somewhere approaching half of all NYFS COVID deaths were in nursing homes, after you foisted infectious patients into such a vulnerable population, are what legal scholars and beat detectives both call "consciousness of guilt".

There should be indictments for criminal negligence and depraved indifference there. One jackhole governor probably caused more deaths than two wars in the Middle East, in as many months.

Proving once again that when you put communists in charge, their first instinct is to start pushing citizens into the wood chippers.
As always.

Big Winner: Shrillary.
Just like Jimmy Peanut heaved a monstrous sigh of relief after the Obozo administration, when peanut-brain suddenly became only the second worst president in U.S. history, the personal body count of Shrillary and the Clinton Family Crime Syndicate has now, nearly overnight, dropped to being only the second-worst place in the Dumbocrat Party all time score list.


BTW, a related item:
8/10. RTWT.
Why only 8/10?

Read Item 6 in that post. Then look at the story above again.
Nursing home administrators are slightly higher than pond scum, in many cases. But when their hands were tied by the CCCP-NY, it's much clearer where the problem - and culpability - lies.

Re: Item 3:
This was an average bad flu season - except in just two months, not a year. 
And this problem isn't over yet; you're teeing up Round Two, as we speak, and you're liable to see triple the score of the first two months by the end of the year.
You'll get the economy rolling, yes, and that's good.
But TANSTAAFL.
You wanted to trade a return to a functioning economy, in exchange for the certainty of more Kung Flu deaths. You'll get your wish, and pay that bill. Darwin always gets his due.
Soft-soaping that is beyond retarded.
 
There is going to be a price, in lives, for any action you take. Suck it up, buttercup.
You asked for it, and you're going to get it. Put on your Big Girl panties and deal with it, but stop pretending it's going to be consequence-free.

As for the other points: clear outta the park. See for yourself.

Highlight Item 4 in yellow highlighter, then underline it in red ink.
We've only been telling you that one for 6 years, so far.
That's why we've been telling you about this all along.
Unfuck yourselves, as necessary.

You will see this material again.

J&J is Getting Railroaded By Morons, And Why You Care

If you were paying close attention yesterday, you might have heard that some inbred robed fuckwit (and his mental incapacity and jurisprudential shortcomings with that appellation should be considered an extremely light sentence) yesterday awarded plaintiffs against Johnson & Johnson some $572M in damages (out of the $17Billion they asked for), due to opiate overdose deaths in the state of OK.

TL;DR:
This is childish magical thinking and judicial bullshit that should get the judge impeached, disbarred, and stoned at the city gates immediately. Then they should go after his family, the plaintiffs, and plaintiff's shyster lawyers. And then their families.

And OK's state Attorney General and his combined staff of dipshits (who pushed this nonsense) should be lynched, and dragged naked by the heels behind horses over rocks, metal shards, and broken glass for about 200 miles. Then they should turn the horses around, and return those AG @$$holes to the point of origin the same way. After that, and only after that, I'm okay with a full pardon of whatever meatsacks remain.

If you live in OK, walk tall. You've officially surpassed CA and NFY for actual jackassery, by several orders of magnitude, as of right now. Which is saying something. They've really raised the fucktard bar with this one to heights normally only attainable with orbital rocketry.

The next 5000 attempts at this sort of horsesh*t should lead to mass roundups, and conga lines to the gas chambers. For the same group of idiots.

In detail, from Fox Business News on Yahoo:

An Oklahoma judge found Johnson & Johnson and Janssen Pharmaceutical Companies liable for stoking the opioid crisis in the state and said the company must pay $572 million, far less the $17 billion that the state was seeking.

Judge Thad Balkman, of Cleveland County District Court in Norman, Oklahoma, is the first judge to rule in the opioid cases brought to trial by thousands of state and local governments against opioid manufacturers and distributors. 

His precedent-setting ruling was being closely watched as 2,000 other pending suits await to be heard before a federal judge in Ohio in October. 

J&J said it plans to appeal Balkman's ruling and that the decision was "flawed."
“Janssen did not cause the opioid crisis in Oklahoma, and neither the facts nor the law support this outcome,” said Michael Ullmann, Executive Vice President, General Counsel, Johnson & Johnson. 

Oklahoma Attorney General Mike Hunter brought the case to trial for seven weeks, arguing the pharmaceutical company executed an intensive marketing campaign that overwhelmed the market and mislead consumers about the addictive risks of the drug.
Hunter seeks $17 billion to cover all costs related to the state addressing the epidemic for the next 30 years, including treatment and prevention programs. 

Oklahoma lawyers dubbed J&J an opioid “kingpin” and alluded to its marketing tactics as a public health nuisance, under law. However, J&J absolves itself of any misconduct and presented research that said its painkillers, Duragesic and Nucynta, comprised a fraction of opioids prescribed in the state. 

Oklahoma escalated the trial after resolving claims against OxyContin maker Purdue Pharma LP in March for $270 million and against Teva Pharmaceutical Industries Ltd in May for $85 million, with only J&J remaining as a defendant.

So, in short, OK  went looking for someone wholly uninvolved, with deep pockets.
And found a judge with an IQ on a par with potted plants (but let's be fair, judges come from lawyers, and the morons don't fall far from the tree there), who looked at the contrary facts and legal doctrine, and decided none of that mattered, then spun his Magic 8-Ball and concluded half a billion dollars of shakedown cash sounded like a good round number.

So first, a little background.

1) Opiate deaths are overwhelmingly caused by heroin and carfentanil (street-cooked synthetic fentanyl, i.e. acetyl fentanyl), - typically the two in combination courtesy of street level pharmaceutical distributors - not by prescription opiates of any kind. I'd spitball it's at a ratio of about 99 to 1, but I may be low-balling the actual numbers for the true percentage of overdoses by street opiates (i.e. it may be 999 to 1 or 9999 to 1).

2) The LD50 of RX-grade fentanyl being unknown, using the Janssen-made Durgesic patches above would require you to slap eighty of them on full-strength, just to get to the highest dosage of Rx tablet. And even then, that still wouldn't kill you.

(We report anecdotally the dumbass we saw in the ER once for possible stroke, upon whom while changing into a gown we found twenty or so of his daily pain patches, each of which are supposed to be removed before putting the new one on the next day. He was wobbly, and seemed impaired/intoxicated, but was alert and with stable vital signs, and once we removed his old patches, his symptoms disappeared in about 15 minutes, and he was released home with no further intervention than a headslap and a serious Dumbass Education Lecture.) In short, Rx fentanyl is responsible for probably roughly zero overdose deaths ever, inclusive, since it was invented. Unless you tried to eat the box, whole, and choked. You'd have to be drinking the stuff in gallon jugs. It's potent but short-acting, and we routinely deliver IV doses 20x the strength of Duragesic patches for simple broken bones, and it wears off in less than an hour, providing nothing but relief of moderate to severe pain with minimal side effects. That's WHY it's used.

3) I don't care if J&J blanketed the airwaves and beamed their ads into your head from space, and gave away multiple truckloads of free samples to every MD in the Okie State, and sold every RX pill they ever got: They are marketing a legal product for legal usage, and the actions of others are not their fault, in reality, or morally, ethically, nor legally, since ever.

Blaming the makers of a legal product, in an excruciatingly highly-regulated trade, for the misdeeds of others using completely different items, whose only similarity is a chemical class, is simply utter horseshit. Such jurisprudence is the hallmark of mental retardation and absolute professional incapacity.

Why you give a fuck:

This case is the equivalent of a judge finding Oneida culpable for forks causing obesity.
It's finding Ticonderoga pencils responsible for causing mistakes on SATs.
And if I haven't made the point blisteringly clear yet,
It's finding Colt, Winchester, Remington, and Ruger guilty for murders and robberies.

It throws all moral agency and legal culpability since Hammurabi on its head, and undoes civilization itself with a penstroke. And Judge Fucktard thought (and I use that term loosely) that was okay.

His law school should revoke his degree tomorrow, and failing that, treating it like Carthage after the Third Punic War should be a baseline recompense for them, too.

If this sort of illegal horseshit is allowed to stand, it's the end of everything since fire and the wheel. I am not exaggerating.

It will start with J&J ceasing all opiate sales to Oklahoma, in perpetuity.
(Hint: they should institute that policy tomorrow. Then refer the howling from hundreds of thousands of agonized senior citizens to Judge Fucktard, and post his home phone number and that of the OK AG on the J&J website for complaints.)
Then every other drug company should follow suit, and will.

It will end with nobody producing anything anywhere, because someone might misuse it, and then sue the guy who made a legal product, just because they have money.

The only difference between this verdict and armed robbery, is that the jackass Judge Fucktard wasn't (as far as we know) wearing a ski mask and doing it with a pistol when he issued his retarded ruling. Otherwise, the difference between this and actual armed robbery is only that.

Judge Fucktard should literally be stripped of office, prosecuted for criminal fuckwittery of a civilizational level, and then taken out back of the courthouse and shot.

And the mentally retarded AG of OKiehoma and all his little fuckwit minions in that office, down to secretarial and janitorial staff, should be next to him, sharing the same fate.
Pour encourger les autres, dulce et decorum est.
Idiot AG Hunter has just highlighted that he needs to be kicked right the fuck out of office, and that the AG is an office the people of OK can do without, until further notice.

And failing this case getting reversed at some level, if and when jurisprudential sanity kicks in, I hope that's exactly what happens to them all.

When you out-Okie entire generations of all Sooner stupidity in one fell swoop, it should leave a mark, and serve as a cautionary tale told around campfire for centuries. If it unleashes pitchfork- and torch-wielding mobs hunting down lawyers for sport from coast to coast, it probably would not go too far, and would be instead a very good start.

We Called This...

Evita Guevara-Castro. You heard it here *first*.

FTR, in our ceaseless joyful attempts to do everything within our Internet power to mock, harass, ridicule, and generally tell the truth about the blisteringly brain-dead failed bartender and single IQ mental midget who is an embarrassment to the Bronx, NYFS, Boston University, the DNC, America, and Puerto Rico, simultaneously, an inspiration to millions of memesters and fountain of fail for literal hordes of comedians, some as yet unborn, we want it noted that we here first correctly tagged this bimbo nigh a year ago as Evita Guevara-Castro, after Peron, Che, and Fidel, respectively, of whom she is the living reincarnation (to the degree that any fungus is alive).

We bring this fact up, with all the rights and privileges thereunto appertaining, in perpetuity, because she has now taken to, in her Twitter twaddle output, to directly quoting Nazi sympathizer and national socialist Evita Peron, directly, with no sense of irony at evoking the mumblings of that exact S. American fascist and banana republic dictator, and husband of a worse one, Evita her ownself. And true to idiot form, Assclown Oddball Chit-For-Brains thinks the appellation of Nazi-loving Evita, including by the President Trump, is something of which to be proud. Proof, if you needed it, that even genius has limits, but that stupidity is infinite.

Color us shocked.

What can we say? When you nail it, you nail it. It can only be a matter of time before she begins including the ramblings of Che and Fidel for the hat trick, of whose politics she's clearly already enamored as well.

Perhaps she's waiting until they release them in her favorite coloring book series.

We sharpen our poisoned pen in unrestrained glee at the prospect.
The extent of her World Class Stupid cannot be measured with existing instrumentation, and may, in fact, be tapping into the universal raw magma source of same, and be an actual volcano of Stupid her entire life. That's our working hypothesis anyways.

Either that, or she's one of Jeff Dunhams sock puppets who was discarded, escaped the dumpster, and subsequently turned into a real girl by some malicious rogue fairy. Also equally likely, at this point.

Assinus Politicus - Assclown Of The Year

It has come as a rudely unpleasant shock to WA state senator and walking braindead jackhole Maureen  Moron Walsh [R - Retardia] that nurses do not, in fact, "play cards for a considerable amount of the day". Only someone who's never performed worthwhile labor in their adult life, and/or has a resting IQ in the low teens, somewhere just north of fungus, could managed to get both feet thusly inserted in their own gaping mouths, with their empty head simultaneously shoved so far up their own hindquarters so as to choke off the passage of light or oxygen. But it always cheers my heart when some elected functional moron's political turkey timer pops up to let us know they're done.

Someone on the Twaddleverse helpfully added her WA office number:
(360) 786-7630.
Have fun.

I will personally pledge to contribute to every opponent she faces in her next primary, and every other party's candidate from opposing parties in the general election, the next time this sorry sack of sh*t is up for a vote. She needs to be kicked RTF out of the state house for being that egregiously stupid in public, and based on her speech, we're guessing this is one of her brighter and more coherent stupid utterances. The rest certainly have to sound like she's having a stroke, every time she squawks and squeals.If she has the good grace to quit now, quickly, I'll contribute a like amount to Alzheimer's research and money to care for actual retarded people.

Were I in WA state, I would be gathering signatures for her immediate recall, as being too stupid to suck air and a waste of skin has to be a disqualifying factor in holding office, even in a community like Walla Walla.

But in true form, the memes and Twittterlanche on her head have been properly brutal.

“Nurses … probably play cards for a considerable amount of the day” is in the running for most inane, indefensible, disgraceful thing said by a legislator this year (even though the competition is really fierce). — Ajai Dandekar (@ajai_dandekar) April 20, 2019

When world-class retards tell you you're retarded, YOU'RE REALLY RETARDED. - A.

(And yes, I made that, but Kathy absolutely tweeted it.)
More here.

I'm also pretty sure Joy Behar ( "Why is she wearing a doctor's stethoscope?") could send along a few tips on coping with being the biggest jackass in America today to state senator Walsh.

I'll be dog-goned if I'm not piling on to this monumental level of stupidity.

And a personal benediction to Sen. Moron Walsh:

Don't worry, Sh*t-For-Brains. No nurse would ever treat you like you just treated a few millions of us.
Or...would they?
Sleep tight. Take your vitamins.
And may God have mercy on you when (not if) you end up in a hospital needing care.
No one else will.
You might want to think about getting some gold-plated Costa Rican medical policy.
For the rest of your life.
And for pity's sake, do the world a favor: Change parties.
You're already overqualified to be a Democrat socialist, so by all means, run down and sign up today. You'll increase the IQ of both Republicans and Democrats in WA state the minute you do that.

But walk tall, sweetheart.
Earning Assclown of The Year honors in April has to be some sort of record, even for a politician who's overmatched by celery bunches at the grocery store in a contest of wits.

You might have thought someone who'd had a heart attack and gotten two cardiac stents a couple of years back would have been a wee bit more circumspect, but remember, this is a politician we're talking about, not someone with a functional brain, let alone one connected to their mouth.

Jesus rose from the dead today. But, you, Bright Light, should invest in a shroud and a cemetery plot.
Hey...is that a fork sticking out of your back?
Yeah, you're done.

Puerto Ricans Come In Blonde Too.



Not a meme: she actually said this.

To Whom It May Concern:

If you're attending Boston University, and the tuition amounts to more than $1/yr, you're being robbed.

Evita Guevara-Castro has made any degree conferred by that alleged college a laughingstock.

Any alumni or current undergraduates should file a class action lawsuit.
Because somewhere there, there's a graduation advisor who traded a sheepskin for a Lewinsky, or a couple of Benjamins.

Meanwhile, Queen Alzheimers Pelosi would like to thank Ms. Obnoxious-Claptrap for fading some of the heat off her, as no longer the stupidest jackass in the House of Representatives. But I think we've established beyond any further doubt who ate the most lead-based paint chips in NYFC growing up 26 years ago.

Can't STFU To Save Her Life

 

Poor Ann Coulter. After another epic pointless rant about how President Trump is "gutless" and "cares nothing about a wall", then the "gutless" President bends Congress over, refuses to sign a stop-gap spending bill without funding for a wall, and squeezes a $5B last-minute concession out of the House of Representatives.

 

Y'know, like presidents who are serious about something do.

 

It must suck to be nothing but a shrill harpie with no clue about how the government actually works, and then go on the biggest bitchfest of this administration, to the delight of only the liberal Trump-hating media (but I repeat myself), and then be shown to be 180 degrees out from reality in less than 48 hours.

 

If only President Trump had vowed to shut down the government over this issue, berated the Democrat leadership about it publicly, on camera, and finally wrung concessions out of the legislative branch, and outgoing House Speaker Quisling.

 

And then there's the small matter of whose job it is to get a wall built.

 

Ann Coulter, former law clerk in the Eighth Circuit, and Michigan Law School grad, yet total constitutional blithering idiot:

“Article I, Sec. 7: All bills for raising Revenue shall originate in the House of Representatives; but the Senate may propose or concur on Amendments, as on other bills.”

ZOMG! It’s almost as if there were some sort of separation of powers, or some such shit. WhoTF knew???

Maybe Ann was sick the day they covered the US Constitution in law school…?

If Ann Coulter voted for Trump because she thought he could seize the government, and rule as Caesar, god-like, from the Oval Office, or thought he was going to pay for the wall out of petty cash and poker winnings himself, she’s a world-class fucktard.

Meanwhile, find me her scathing rejoinders to Paul Quisling Ryan and Bitch McConjob’s dithering on a wall, non-stop, any time in the last two years.

Go ahead, post them all.

I’ll wait.

Wait, what?
Nothing?
You're sure about that?
How can that be...?

Wow, it's almost like she's the one who claims to be conservative, but can't seem to get her foot out of her mouth when there's a whole do-nothing GOP Congress who voted for wall funding twelve times - until they had a president who'd actually build a wall.
And then all took early retirement rather than facing the wrath of the voters.

Say, wait a minute, wasn't that what happened with repealing ObozoCare??
And wasn't the mantra then just "Repeal"??
Not "Repeal - and Replace (With More Socialism)"???

Quick, get me Lexis-Nexis...there must be dozens of Ann Coulter's shrill ranting pieces giving Quisling Ryan and Bitch McConjob rhetorical hell for that one, week in and week out, for the last two years.

What??
Crickets chirping again??
Gosh, it's almost like Ann is shrilly shilling for the George Will chair on ABC's This Week With Clinton's Former Toady, (from back when Fat Bill was raping women and molesting interns in the Oval Office).

This is Ann, giving a tongue bath to the Never-Trump crowd, because she’s going to need them for a gig when Trump’s gone.

Apparently, when your ovaries dry up, insanity sets in with a vengeance, regardless of where you sit on the political spectrum. It’s going to hit cat-lady Coulter particularly hard. Ask her how rampant senility has worked out for George Will’s career.

And we’re hosed because the GOPe retired en masse after doing nothing, and is sitting perplexed, with its collective head up its ass, while the Democrats steal entire counties from them in the weeks-long election of 2018, just like they’re going to do in 2020 nationwide.

Quick, get me the Coulter columns attacking the House and Senate for ignoring the ballot-box stuffing going on nationwide just last month, since the Constitution explicitly states that those bodies are the sole arbiters of whom they seat, and could refuse the shadily-elected members in a heartbeat, right now, with full legal authority, and the Dems couldn't do shit about that.

Oh, c-mon now, you're kidding me?
She hasn't said anything about that either?

Geez, it's almost like she was...a Democrat stooge.
Naaaaah, can't be, they'd be harping on Trump for not doing things outside the scope of his office, and focusing on witch hunt investigations run by corrupt crooks with iron-clad conflicts of interest and partisan hack staffs, and if that happened, Ann would certainly have written reams of column ink about...wait, what?

Nothing?

Not a single column drawing upon her stellar legal expertise, by pointing out that the prior AG, and the current acting AG, could both fire Mueller tomorrow, then follow up with shit-canning  undercover  hiding-in-plain-sight Obozo holdout deputy AG Rosenswine, which should have been her mantra 24/7/365 since the day Mueller was hired?

You're kidding me, right?
No scathing calls about the endless ongoing slow coup since before Trump was even elected?
Are we sure she's even registered to vote Republican?

Well, with friends like this clueless banshee, her prediction about 2020 is prescient.
Pay close attention to the D nominee in 2020: that’s your next president, short of ropes and nooses for the guilty.

You’ve got about 22 months – maybe – to unfuck your preps before we begin the reign of HopeyDopey/Clinton v3.0.

And the next Great Depression could be any time.

If anybody’s hosed, it’s from electing jackholes, and their own apathy and lethargy for not even showing up, at any level, and not because of anything done or not done in the White House since January 2017.

I'm sure next week's column will be another apology for jumping the gun and getting it wrong, just like she's done the last ten times she's been wrong about Trump.

Wait, WTF??
She's never done that once either?
Color me shocked.

So, anyone: tell me how it worked out dumping Bush (41) for that other guy over his "Read My Lips: No New taxes" blunder?
1993-2001 worked out so well for her then too, I suppose?

Then explain to me the faux-outrage over Trump signing away bump stocks, when five minutes ago anyone with an opinion was busy pointing out bump stocks are worthless for doing anything but converting ammunition to noise, without any accuracy, and oh, BTW, can be replicated with a rubber band?

This horsesh*t is just trolling for the actual Never-Trumpers to come out and self-identify.

Coulter, meanwhile, seems to have sold a lot of books, including one totally drawing on Trump's election, without helping the political debate much.

Trump is simply a the guy with his finger in the dam.
And loudmouth twat Ann, once again, is the Wrong Way Corrigan idiot with both feet shoved way down her own throat, as the last two days have proven.

This FBI Investigation I Want To See

h/t Gateway Pundit

Not even two days since testi-lying under oath to Congress, fake-rape victim Brassy Fraud lied within moments of opening her mouth to the Senate Judiciary Committee, and with virtually every statement she made.

As we told you last week, Gateway Pundit was all over this like white on rice:

Brassy Fraud lied about her professional and educational status. There's no record of a doctorate nor licensure as a psychologist anywhere in the records of the state of California.

She lied about the remodel and additional front door that supposedly necessitated couples therapy, where she pulled Kavanaugh's name out of her ass; the remodel was completed years before her sudden Kavanaugh recollection moment, which actually occurred just as presidential candidate Romney put his name out there as a possible SCOTUS pick, in 2012. The door was put in in 2007-8.

She lied about her "fear of flying" and claustrophobia, since she's flown around like a rock star, for years, apparently suffering no ill effects of the experience until there's a candidate about to join SCOTUS who would undo her pet Leftard cause.

This is on top of the lies about Kavanaugh, and an imaginary party, which are not he said/she said, but rather she said, and every alleged witness, five of them, in fact, including her lifelong female friend, all deny ever took place anywhere, anytime, in any way.

Her response to that last, under oath, was to throw her friend under the bus on national television, insinuating that her friend's "health issues" were so severe that it has caused her to lose her mind, and all memories that would substantiate Brassy Fraud's recockulous allegations. Like it does. Said no one telling the truth, ever.

"Ah, but the strawberries! That's where I had them! They laughed and called me names, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt and with geometric logic..."

In the hamster-wheel recesses of her swiss-cheese mind, Professor Catlady Brassy Fraud is telling the truth, and everyone else is lying. How...convenient.

So when the FBI 302s detailing these realities come to light, and are presented to the Senate Judiciary without commenting nor making a conclusion about what happened sometime in the summer of 1982, somewhere in Maryland, any such imaginary and unreported crime which became moot, and unprosecutable in any way 35 years ago, when the misdemeanor statute of limitations expired even in the highly unlikely event that anything whatsoever the deranged pussyhat moonbat serial liar alleged ever happened in reality, we can but hope that Chairman Chuck Grassley remembers that the Senate has within its power the ability to refer federal perjury charges to the FBI and the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia, particularly in a case that happened less than a week ago, under oath, before Congress, and in front of the entire nation on live TV. If a blogger can uncover this much in less than 48 hours, surely the investigative powers of the FBI can stumble over it in a week, right? RIGHT...???

And we'd also like a pony, and world peace, the winning powerball lotto ticket, and the cell phone number of Playmate of the year.

We leave it to the readership to judge which will likely happen first.



UPDATE: To those of you who think "nothing will happen", nota bene: Chuckles has apparently reached the point of "This sh*t isn't funny any more." and invoked the long-standing "Fake an allegation, go to federal pound-you-in-the-@$$-prison" Rule.

We did, indeed, laugh out loud in response.

Cue the Leftard shrieking in 3, 2, ...

The Latest From Evita Guevara-Castro

h/t 100%F'edUp

When you start with a pre-literate functional moron with delusions of grandeur and a communism fetish, the fruit isn't going to fall very far from the tree:

(LUNITARDIA) On Cuomo Prime Time, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez said that socialized medicine will be affordable because people will no longer have to pay for funerals.

This from someone with no less than a degree in economics and international relations from Boston University, and over $100K in unpaid student loans to prove it. (I'm betting the midnight throat-slitting over there will start any day now, and the retroactive revocation of that clearly worthless degree hangs on the results of November's election.)

Such a one-person cornucopia of assclownery as Ms. Logorrhea Ocrazio-Dorkuez is magnificent in its unabashed splendor, and gives forth its bounty like an elephant with diarrhea. The smell of the product, in both cases, seems remarkably similar too. Coincidence taking a hand, no doubt.

I can't figure out whether she isn't being frequently and openly tackled - like the Secret Service loading Shrillary into a van - merely because her nominal minders just aren't fast enough, or whether it's because everyone from the media to her team of retards are all in lockstep agreement with every insaniac thing she's saying, and totally obliviously tone-deaf to reality, but I'm too busy clutching my sides to care at this point.

I'll say it again: Mad Maxine Waters isn't going to live forever. Infernal hosts uncountable are doubtless hoof-pawing the sulfurous ground of the netherworld in anticipation of the bounty her imminent arrival represents.

So in anticipation of her loss to the lampoonery dais, we need to get fuckwitted loudmouthed jackasses like Carmen Miranda Chiquita Banana into positions where they'll have the maximum public exposure possible, for as long as possible. I'd much rather have someone so hopelessly clueless she'll be a perennial laughingstock, than leave her hopelessly Dumbocrat seat in the Bronx to someone with the Trifecta of Awful that is stupid, evil, and effective, which was the brief of the old pol she's nominally slated to replace in the upcoming pro forma election in her district. Barring Christmas in November.

A couple of more such phenomenal gaffes by Ms. Avocado Pendejo-Chavez, and I'm seriously considering sending her campaign cash money to insure her ascendancy to the Mad Maxine Chair of Luntard University.

 

Word to su madre, pendeja :

 

Obamacare was gutted long since, and angling for it is what put Pelosi on the sidelines, not once but twice. Almost 200 of your soon-to-be colleagues, and another 200-plus former ones, learned that to their political ruin the hard way, and their ass cheeks still haven't grown back from the lesson.

 

Ixnay on the ocializedsay edicinemay. It's a poisoned pill that's killed everyone it's touched.

Not least of whom the erstwhile patients.

 

Ask around at the local VA.