How Not To Do This



Morons in action. This is the cover pic for my upcoming book, Pandemic
Prevention For Dummies. It's like looking for a gas leak with a lit road
flare, or looking for a tiger with a bloody dripping side of beef. 

As businesses  grope for ways to re-open without doing it using Gilligan Logic, they're searching for ways to limit the exposure of their employees and customers to Kung Flu.

The brighter lights out there are actually putting some thought into what they do, and don't do. In that light, recently, another blogger PM'ed me about using temperature checks.

It's a poor choice, other than being the only non-invasive non-test-dependent indicator.
That last is the only thing in its favor.

1) The TSA uses it. That alone should tell you all you need to know, but we'll continue.

2) When checking temperatures, rectal is most accurate, axillary (armpit) is least, and oral is problematic (for instance, if you're sipping iced tea or hot coffee - which I used to get a doctor's note during college, and almost bought myself an ICU sepsis admission, because I overdid it). At any rate, you're trying to determine body core temperature, with reasonably close accuracy.

3) My hospital is using thermal sensors like A/C and heating techs use. Worst method of all, because it's measuring skin temp, not core temp. (That goes for forehead strips too, btw.) And we're a hospital, FFS. It's pure kabuki theater. And can be defeated simply by pressing an ice pack against your forehead for a minute before entering, even if you had a fever of 104° F. (And no, don't pull that dumbass trick either. If you have a fever, stay your @$$ at home.)

4) Ear temps run the risk of poor circulation, ear infections, and cerumen impaction, so false readings, both ways.
 

5) Killer app problem: asymptomatic carriers with NO fever. That was the problem with the last strain/outbreak of Ebola, BTW: 50% of those infected showed no fever spike.

Kung Flu may be as high as 90%. Any percentage at all means using temperature as a screening method pretty much guarantees you're letting foxes into the chicken coop, every day, and rolling the dice on outcomes. Just like the actual Typhoid Mary, asymptomatic carriers have been driving the bus on the Kung Flu outbreak in every country, since Day One to right this minute. That's what makes this disease such a royal flaming pain in the @$$. So using temperature as a screening tool is World-Class Stupid, in the same league as trying to catch flies with a hula hoop, and no net. Or issuing your minefield clearing parties sledge hammers and pogo sticks. Only not quite as smart as that.

 

Like the TSA and Customs and Immigration has been doing with air travel during this pandemic, for a virus that may not show symptoms for 11-21 days, if ever, not to put too fine a point on it.

TL;DR: Temp checks: Better than nothing, but not by much.

 

BTW: The book-standard average range is 97.6°F to 99.6°F = normal.

I.e. 98.6°F, ±1°F either way, for oral.

-1°F for axillary range.

+1°F for rectal range.

(not that you're going to ever do rectal temps at work or anything, just for completeness).

If your business is planning to do temperature checks, and you can get away with it, beat them cheerfully about the head and shoulders with a large 2x4. What they're telling you, as an employee, is that they're using you for live bait in the mosquito trap, and your bosses are too stupid to work for.

So, knowing that, why would the TSA use temperature to screen out arriving passengers for Kung Flu?

"Because we're from the government, and we're here to help..."