Priorities

h/t CW

Babylon Bee Scooped Again!

They always get their man.

 

Whom Gods Destroy...

h/t Tam

Bud Light: "Watch us torpedo our brand, lose a billion dollars, and drive ourselves out of business."
Jaguar: "Hold my beer, and start your engines..."

 

"...if the purpose of advertising is to get people talking about you, the new ad campaign has succeeded at that." - Tam

 Someone has perhaps conflated "talking about" with "pointing and laughing derisively and uproariously at".

♫ One of these things is not like the other one. ♫

And when last we looked, as a general rule, the purpose of advertising isn't "to get people talking about you", it's to get people to buy your product. We haven't read a marketing textbook in 40 years, so we may be wrong about that, but we doubt it.

So unless androgynous and transgendered freaks is an emerging market for high-end car manufacturing, this ad campaign is going to go over about as well as Bud Light hiring Dylan Mulvaney as a spokes-tranny did.

Jaguar's ad campaign is selling something.

But that Something isn't anything to do with selling their cars.

At least now we know the real reason Ellen Degeneres left the U.S. was to oversee all advertising for Jaguar. Someone needs to sack her, and then sack the person who hired her.

It bears mention, from a medical standpoint, that the people who make such desperate cries for attention as what Jaguar just did are generally the same psychotic chicks cutting their wrists with razor blades.

Put Daniel Craig (or hell, even Ryan Reynolds) in a tux, stand him next to a silver F-type R-75, have him deliver a few lines, and then have him drive off, with that bundle of neon oddities chained to the rear bumper as he Tokyo drifts the entire gaggle over a cliff, and Jaguar's woketarded misstep is history.

Do it not, and their brand is history. And this ad campaign can be seen for what it is: Jaguar drunk dialing their ex, with a box cutter in hand, and a bottle of sleeping pills, demanding he come back, or else.

Happy Thanksgiving

The West Wing, both fairly and unfairly, took a lot of crap as The Left Wing, but despite the libtard leanings of its actors and production staff more off-camera than on, it mostly wasn't that. It was mainly, and most belovedly, a yearning for America and the White House staff at the best we wish they were, and want them to be. 

For the first four seasons, under the helm of creator and chief screenwriter Aaron Sorkin, one of the most brilliant wordsmiths of all time where any script is concerned, it was mostly an attempt to cobble together, using cinematic immunity, a far better representation of those in government they wished  they had than the Democrats could ever get from such real-life execrable human mediocrities foisted on the republic as Jimmy Peanut, Fat Bill, Obozo, and Dopey Gropey Joe, or any of their lesser minions.

And for those moments, I think he ought to be forgiven for the lesser jabs and earnest fantasies, and given the accolades due for the moments when entertainment was made to serve a greater truth.

You have our warmest best wishes on this holiday, and we only hope you can use it to celebrate the best this country is and can be, and to give thanks to whatever power or deity you recognize to maintain and sustain it in its better state, rather than its worst moments. Take a moment to remember and help those less fortunate, and to consider those who must needs be far from home and family on this holiday weekend because of work and duty.

We have much yet to do, but much more for which to be truly thankful today.

May God bless and keep you and yours today, and all days.

NTTAWWT

That Boone's Farm & Everclear sneaks up on you like that.

One YouTuber said she sounded "Drunk and Crazy".

Our rejoinder to that is "How is that any different from how she's sounded for the last ten years?!?"

I hope someone sends her a box of kittens for Christmas, to complete her retirement kit, so she has something with which to share the rest of her vacuous and besotted existence.

Her second-best offer is to join Shrillary when ABC offers the two of them the next two chairs on the coven over at ABC's The Spew.

PSA

 h/t CW

Quite The Poser

 h/t Bacon Time

FIFY

 h/t Wilder

Refer to the original meme in case you're unclear.

Every vote helped Trump win, but trying to claim victory for the 5th-lowest scoring demographic, whose contribution was negligible, and without which Trump would still have received >51% of the votes, is simply beyond the pale, and borderline retarded.

It almost rates the Biff Tannen "Make Like A Tree" Award, but we'll be generous, and assume some amount of alcohol played a part in Elijah's calculations the day after Election Day.

One can but hope that Elijah's day job is not one where calculation plays a major part.

Baby Duck And Cover

Given: Nuclear war would be a bad thing.

And please believe me when I tell you that every possible nuclear war scenario has been wargamed out 20,000 times, and continues to be, multiple times annually, in multiple countries, particularly the nine (so far) acknowledged to have functional nuclear arsenals. And we usually assign our brightest strategists to play the OPFOR's side, just to keep everyone honest.

And what is the result, in every one of 20,000 scenarios?

It's that if one nuke flies, from anywhere, to anywhere, ALL of them fly, worldwide, times every country that has them, generally within about 72 hours of Event Zero. Every. Single. Time.

Go back and read that again in case you missed it. I have no need to bullshit anyone on this; it's findable in a hundred open-source articles. You could look it up.

So knowing that, you have three things to occupy your time.

1) You either have access, within minutes (measured in single digits) to a fallout and/or blast-proof nuclear shelter, with the necessaries to ride out the actual apocalypse. Or, you don't. Either way, you have nothing to worry about. For different reasons, in each event.

2) If you feel the need to Chicken Little anywhere on the internet, to any degree, about decisions around the world which would unleash a nuclear weapon, over which you have less than zero control (and I'm not naming any names or pointing any fingers here), your posts and bloviations generally aren't going to age well. Because

3) Either nothing is going to happen. (And for but one example, if you're Rootin' For Putin, his life expectancy if he reaches for the nuclear option can be measured in the draw time for any one of a dozen Makarovs pointed at his head from phone booth range. Which is why he's rattled that saber 57 times in the last three years, with zero intent to ever do anything, because he reads the same wargame studies from his guys.) Or pretty much all life north of the equator will be snuffed in a very short period. And you're back to Point 1, above.

Either way, nothing you could say or do on the topic is likely to make any difference for you, or anyone you'd reach, unless they live in Australia, or had 8-figure disposable incomes to establish a zombie apocalypse warlord base of operations - and did exactly that YEARS ago.

Neither you nor anyone reading your stuff is on the Nuclear Football phone tree, and our first clue about things will likely be when the weekend football feed goes all snowy with zero warning, followed by an annoying tone coming out of the tube.

If they even bother. It will be even less useful than anything else FEMA has ever done, which is saying something. Learn that now, and wrap your head around it ahead of time. If you're not 20 feet from a long-term shelter you control, you may as well just bend over and kiss your ass goodbye.

Sorry to piss on your apocalypse party, but there it is. Some of us went through this before you were born, for decades on end, and figured all this out before you got out of plastic pull-ups.

See if you can guess why we're less than impressed with it the second time around.

If anyone really cares, there are great books on the whole topic, most of them free online as pdfs, and so old most of the authors have already long since died. (That right there should serve as a hint about how timely this information is.)

So at the end of the day, all you're accomplishing, by running to and fro on the topic, is advertising your Baby Duck status to all and sundry, because you just started noticing a subject that was old news by about 1960. (For Common Core grads, that would be 64 years ago.) That's not a good look, nor a great resume-builder.

And unless you own one of those old Atlas or Titan missile silos (in which case, why bring the topic up at all?? You don't need more drop-in guests come the day...), and have converted it into a plush nuclear war retreat long before now, all you're doing is killing electrons and wasting bandwidth, and you're not going to be one of the 1%-of-the-population surviving nuclear mutants who comes out of the other end of that pipeline, should the unthinkable happen, to a statistically inarguable 99% certainty.

So stop flapping your wings, squawking, and shitting everywhere.

It's kind of embarassing.

For you.

So maybe less clickbait, and more utility, over something that actually matters.

Group Physiology 101

 Coming weeks will determine whether the entire Democommunist Party and its adherents are simply a societal emetic, or instead an actual civilizational laxative.

Either way, the purging is going to be a sight to behold.

Stock up on beverages and popcorn.

The only thing to remember about 2028 is that it's coming, and there's nothing you can do about that. Plan ahead now, so you've little to worry about come the day.

Sunday Music: I'm Not In Love

Groundbreaking wall-of-voices sound made by looping several feet of tape with band members singing one note per track, which were then faded alternately to create the chords of the song. It sounded so ethereal and innovative for the time that it propelled this single to the Top Ten worldwide, #1 in the UK, and #2 in the US, and put 10cc on the musical map, getting them a major recording contract on the strength of this one song. Debuting in 1975, it's lasted long enough to be heard most recently on the soundtrack of Guardians Of The Galaxy, forty years later.

Who Run Bartertown?

h/t Divemedic

 

No one who matters gives a f**k about these rent-a-shill c*nts and their command hallucinatory allegations.

The president-elect appointed someone? Unless you have video proof of them with a dead girl or a live boy, no one else should GAF either. It's background noise, and we aren't playing by their rules any more.

Ultimately, if his picks aren't confirmed, Trump should fire everyone he can at that agency/department, step in himself, and send everyone else there home on unpaid leave until his choices are confirmed. Let it grind to a screeching halt.

We can get to less government by January 21st, 2025 that way, and the screams would penetrate 30' of reinforced concrete in 0.2 seconds.

On January 22nd, if they still don't get it, he should start closing every federal office and building in every Democrat's district and state, including the Post Office. If that means moving entire military commands out to other bases/states, so be it. Call it a deployment readiness exercise.

By Day Three, all his picks would be confirmed, 100-0.

You play ball with the Donald, or you get the bat shoved up your @$$. With barbed wire embedded in the business end.

He should have taught them that lesson by Day Two of his first term, but it's never too late to readjust their perspective on "Who run Bartertown?"

This kind of realpolitik isn't pretty. It's f***ing beautiful.

Personally, I'd start with Adam Schiff-head, and start pulling the military out of their CA bases at 0001 hours on January 22nd next year, until further notice, and put every government contract hereabouts on indefinite hold. Including redeploying the entire Coast Guard currently in the state, and all air traffic controllers, out of the state entirely. The Navy would be told to anchor in international waters, and every other swinging Richard would be removed from the state NLT midnight, same day.

Schiff-head would find out where his bread was buttered before the morning paper hit his doorstep the next morning, and that would be the end of that, at warp speed.

Grab the Senate by the pussy.

And take notes on who started this crap, and pay them back every single day, until they cry and beg for mercy. Then kick them while they're down. In the crotch.

Remember this scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark?: 

Marion Ravenwood:"I can be reasonable!"

Major Toht, waving a red hot poker "That time is passed."

Ravenwood: "Wait! I'll tell you everything!"

Toht, basking in the glow of that poker "Yes. I know you will."

That needs to be every single day of the coming administration, until their biggest fear is drawing Trump's attention, let alone his ire.

Elections have consequences. Losing this one means the party out of power gets to suck it, hard, every single day, until they learn to suck less. If that's even possible.

"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot have both." 

- Nicolo Machiavelli, The Prince

How We Undid It - wherein we scoop the Babylon Bee!

"Who's sorry now, Chlamydia?
Suck it, bitch!"

(Aesociated Press) BREAKING -

Highly placed sources in the Harris campaign have revealed what they believe is smoking crack gun evidence of how they lost the election, with conclusive proof it was all Biden's fault.

In a detailed allegation, they explained in depth and detail how Sam Brinton, the disgraced transvestite kleptomaniac appointed by the Biden regime as the perfect man woman person to oversee nuclear waste (what could possibly go wrong there?), was recalled from ignominious disgrace to be the key player needed to help undermine and ultimately undo the Harris/Walz presidential campaign, literally at the last possible minute.

In a story reminiscent of James Bond, the explanation is that in Operation Cornpop,  Brinton was assigned, by Biden loyalists still seething at the coup that ousted Joe from his re-election bid - to travel by air from Miami to Dallas on November 5th. During this trip, using his acknowledged expertise in luggage theft, he stole five suitcases - two in Florida, and three in Texas - containing tens of thousands of pre-printed mail-in ballots for Harris and Walz from those respective states, shortstopping them from getting to their destinations with Harris campaign operatives in crucial precincts in each state, in order to run them through ballot counting machines in both states thousands of times on election eve.

Brinton bringing home the goods at a Dallas suburb
 safehouse at the end of Operation Cornpop.

As a direct result, lacking those ballots, in neither state was the Harris campaign able to manufacture an additional 2,000,000 imaginary votes in each state, which familiar Blue Hump would have swung 70 electoral votes from Trump to Harris, changing a resounding Harris defeat into a stinging trouncing of Trump, and moving the tally from 312-226 in Trump's favor, to 296-242 into Harris' favor, and making her the first Indian Black cackling 80-IQ prostitute to occupy the presidency.

Laying out the details of the successful caper, one key staffer remarked, "Hey, it's one thief robbing another thief. What are they going to do? Call the cops on us?? As if! Sometimes, you just have to shank a skank to get respect!"

Sunday Music: You're Only Lonely

JD Souther was a prolific songwriter, sharing or collaborating with Glenn Frey and Don Henley of the Eagles often enough they called him a friend of the band, and he regularly farmed songs out to other singers and other bands' frontmen. His few well-known appearances were things like a duet with James Taylor on Her Town Too, or a movie cameo as a singer covering a Platters' standard in Always. But once in awhile, like in 1979, he saved a little gem like today's track, and everyone realized what we'd all been missing. It peaked at #7, and featured backing harmony by music legends Phil Everly, Jackson Brown, and Eagles members Frey, Henley, and Don Felder. It's always nice when you can get a few friends to help you crank out a little tune.

No One Is Buying This

 h/t Odd Job

Burn The Mother****er Down

 h/t Mike

Marn'i Washington, fired FEMA stooge and future federal
felon, whose entire defense boils down to
"But, we've always done it this way!"

Deprivation of Rights Under Color Of Authority

Whoever, under color of any law, statute, ordinance, regulation, or custom, willfully subjects any person in any State, Territory, Commonwealth, Possession, or District to the deprivation of any rights, privileges, or immunities secured or protected by the Constitution or laws of the United States, or to different punishments, pains, or penalties, on account of such person being an alien, or by reason of his color, or race, than are prescribed for the punishment of citizens, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than one year, or both; and if bodily injury results from the acts committed in violation of this section or if such acts include the use, attempted use, or threatened use of a dangerous weapon, explosives, or fire, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than ten years, or both; and if death results from the acts committed in violation of this section or if such acts include kidnapping or an attempt to kidnap, aggravated sexual abuse, or an attempt to commit aggravated sexual abuse, or an attempt to kill, shall be fined under this title, or imprisoned for any term of years or for life, or both, or may be sentenced to death. - 18 USC §242

Conspiracy

If two or more persons conspire either to commit any offense against the United States, or to defraud the United States, or any agency thereof in any manner or for any purpose, and one or more of such persons do any act to effect the object of the conspiracy, each shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than five years, or both. - 18 USC §371

Misprision Of Felony

Whoever, having knowledge of the actual commission of a felony cognizable by a court of the United States, conceals and does not as soon as possible make known the same to some judge or other person in civil or military authority under the United States, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than three years, or both. - 18 USC §4

As the scope of the FEMA scandal, wherein supervisory personnel made it written FEMA policy to discriminate against disaster victims based on political affiliation, has spread to being a long-standing and widespread agency practice, it's time to remind people that such acts are not simply party fouls, but criminal acts under federal law, and that everyone who participated, or knew about but did not intervene to stop the practice, nor report a felonious official policy, up and down the entire FEMA chain of command, should be investigated, arrested, charged, and prosecuted under the above two sections of federal law, and imprisoned for appropriate terms in federal prison, both pour encourger les autres, and because they're fucking federal criminals who need to spend fifteen years apiece in federal pound-you-in-the-ass prison, just to drive the point home. If that includes a FEMA director or cabinet-level secretary or three, all the better. Make Justice Great Again.

To hell with looking the other way, letting it slide, two-tiered justice, and weaponized government.

Round those bastards up, perp-walk them to jail, lock those motherfuckers up, and prosecute to the fullest extent of federal law, then bathe in the gallons of tears of progtards who will suddenly understand the second part of Fuck Around, and Find Out!

Fair is fair: first one in that group to roll over
and dime out all the other members gets off
with only 5 years in prison. Everyone else
gets maxxed out, unless they can point to someone
 higher in the food chain.

The higher up and more widespread the number of criminal defendants of this corrupt regime who get federal prison time, the better I like it. Clean out FEMA's house with a flamethrower.

                                               HOOAH!

And prosecute it in federal court in the states concerned, not in the D.C. swamp. Every count of deprivation is times every person skipped. All counts to be served consecutively.

Sell tickets and popcorn, and broadcast it live on C-SPAN.

Off To An Excellent Start

h/t Mike

Gabbard and Gaetz are excellent picks by Trump, but if Gaetz hasn't indicted most of his predecessors and their underlings by next Valentine's Day, he's a waste of skin and oxygen. And the bloodletting next January at CIA and FBI should be best described as "biblical".

Gabbard should also publicly recommend that everyone who gaslighted the Hunter Biden laptop as "Russian disinformation" have their security clearances revoked immediately, and permanently, followed by Trump signing off on that. Perhaps the liars from the intel community can get jobs at McDonald's, instead of working on corporate boards and at defense contractors after their government disservice.

Thune, meanwhile, is just Yertle Jr. SS,DD.

The Senate is broken. Any Republican senator in place for more than two terms should be deliberately primaried out, in perpetuity, until we get a Senate that does the nation's business, instead of just lining their own pockets.

Revoking the Seventeenth Amendment in total as the constitutional abortion it has been since ever, and returning to the state legislatures appointing their senators, as specified in the Constitution originally, is the only remedy that will avail.

It would give states the voice in the federal government they currently lack (by exact Progressive design), and undo the demagoguery among senators, as legislatures could simply recall the loudmouthed idiots the minute they got too big for their britches.

It would also tip the Senate to at least 59-41 in favor of the [R]s, making a bombproof majority, and relegating ChuckYou Schumer and his cronies to impotently yapping from the back bench in 95% of all cases, while sweeping in a slate of federal judges at all levels slightly to the right of Clarence Thomas and Sam Alito, which would transform the country for the next two generations, and lead to judicially blocking and undoing literal metric fucktons of libtard stupidity that has accumulated nationwide since 1932.

That one act would fast-track getting our republic back.

The Seventeenth Amendment cannot be repealed soon enough.

3-0, Lifetime.

 h/t Borepatch

FIFY

 h/t WRSA

That's A "Tell"

Sunday Music: Sloop John B

 

Today's Sunday Music pick is dedicated to all the earnest little libtard morons sitting in stunned shock, in a puddle of their own tears, wondering how all their foolish fantasies turned out to be nothing but a bong-fueled hopeium dream.

If they wet themselves over last Tuesday night, wait until they get the next four years smacked in their face across both cheeks. Imagine a MAGA boot stomping on a libtard face, forever.

Oh Snap!

A Debt To Be Repaid. With Interest.

Memo From The Office Of The President-Elect:

To All Executive Branch Departments and Offices:

Love & Kisses,

Donald J. Trump

President Elect

O Please. O Please. O Please.

The Statute Of Limitations On Election Fraud Is...?

We now have the exact number
of fake Dem votes cast in 2020

Related: It's like reality is on the tip of their tongue, but they can't quite admit the obvious.

And She's Overqualified For It

@1:04

47

BREAKING: The Entire U.S. Department of Justice is on suicide watch, and there's a surge of private jets leaving the DC metro area, headed for countries without extradition treaties with America.

The Executive branch bloodletting next January should be biblical.

Election Day PSA

When you frame the problem incorrectly, all your variables come out wrong.

(Addendum: I headed over to my polling place about 1600 local time. Normally there's 10-12 people, and it takes about 5 minutes to get inside to vote. This time, 80 people ahead of me. Took 45 minutes to get inside, took 2 minutes to vote. For the first time in years, on a multi-page paper ballot with check boxes. Not punch cards, not electronic voting machines. When I came out, the line was 100+ people long, snaking down the length of building and then halfway around the block. Another 40-50 folks while I waited showed up to drop off their mail-in ballots. And the location was open for early voting since last week. Whatever the final results, the turnout looks to be epic.)

Dude, Where's My Road?

h/t CW

Forecast

To one and all, wherever you are, we offer our best wishes to you in dealing with whatever happens going forward. We are anything but optimistic.

FIFY

h/t WRSA

Sunday Music(a little late): Why Not Me

Having heard tracks from the Judds' Wynonna and Naomi EP, when their Why Not Me album came out later in 1984, I grabbed it, and recorded it onto a cassette tape, which helped get me through the most monotonous Caribbean amphibious cruise since Colombus' men almost mutinied in the fifteenth century looking for the Spice Islands. I played it until I wore the sound off it. The title track, also the first album single released, went all the way to #1 on the country chart, with the album staying on the charts for nearly four years, and making their debut full studio album double platinum. The Judd's country superstar mother/daughter combo with phenomenal vocal harmony was cemented almost instantly, and at only 7 years and as many albums - voted the top country duo every single year - their performance and recording career was tragically cut far too short, far too soon. But this track will always be 24 karat solid gold.

{Sorry for the tardiness. This was teed up Saturday night, but I had urgent business until well after midnight Sunday. It's still Sunday in Hawaii...}

Just Saying...

Just beating Wilder to the punch.

Five Days