Problems Solved While You Wait

h/t WRSA

Difficult problems require simple solutions.

Oh. My. Dear. God.

 

I...

I mean...

This can't be...

It's a parody...

Wait?! It's real?!?!?

What the...?

Words almost fail to do this justice.

This guy should've just been killed, on the spot, FFS. As a mercy killing. For the good of the service.

Incredibly, this happened at least a year ago. A decade or two hence, it would have been an entire episode of 60 Minutes, and the Secretary of Defense would have been impeached for cause. And probably would have had to flee the country to somewhere without an extradition treaty to avoid the federal trial afterwards.

After watching this ungodly piece of total walking shit fuck up harder than a platoon full of retards just in his non-judicial Mast, while underway submerged on USS Wyoming (SSBN-742) I have a scant few questions:

1) How in blistering fuck is this asshole on any nuclear missile submarine? EVAR?!?

2) How in blistering fuck did this walking piece of shit every get on any submarine that wasn't a landlocked tour, or a ride at a Disneyland amusement park?

3) Why the fuck is this being handled at an Article 15 Captain's Mast, instead of a Special Court Martial?

4) Why isn't Seaman Recruit Fuckbag not doing 5-10 years under confinement at hard labor at the Military Correctional Facility in Fort Leavenworth, KS, spending 16 hours a day beating the shit out of boulders with a sledgehammer until his bones screamed in agony, every single day, prior to receiving a Bad Conduct Discharge??

5) Why isn't everyone in this shitbag's chain of command, from SecDef down to his Leading Petty Officer, not getting the shit grilled out of them by 20 Senators and Congressweasels live on national television for endangering the national security of the United States of America, specifically with regard to willfully and negligently disregarding the safety and integrity of our strategic nuclear weapons delivery systems, for ever letting such an unredeemed piece of walking human shit within 50 miles of a nuclear missile submarine, and facing charges up to and including treason?

6) Why isn't Seaman Recruit Fuckbag's face and body not lumped up like a row of anti-tank dragon's teeth from the results of nightly "blanket parties" administered by his entire watch, in shifts, using bars of soap in a sock administered from head to toe, prior to his flagrantly insubordinate appearance at this Mast, just to instill in him the bare minimum of respect and military courtesy for his chain of command??

7) How in blistering fuck did anyone pass this shitbomb through recruit training, let alone sign him up for the Navy in the first place?

While this CO has the patience of a saint, tolerating such flagrant and willful disobedience and disrespect, and letting this shitbag off with a few days confinement on bread and water, is like the CO wiping his ass on his own uniform and the ship's national ensign (that would be the U.S. flag for lubbers) at the same time.

The most reasonable and expeditious punishment for this 80-IQ piece of walking shit should have been to have the Master At Arms take him to the Trash Disposal Unit, physically stuff him inside it, jumping on it as necessary to get it closed, compact his body using the machinery provided, eject it overboard at depth, and record his subsequent status as Unauthorized Absence - Presumed Desertion At Sea.

And that gentle treatment, only because Keelhauling and Flogging Round The Fleet have sadly gone out of vogue.

Everyone who touched him all the way back to the recruiter who signed him into the Navy should be reduced one grade permanently, and receive a permanent punitive letter of counselling for their official service record.

I know senior NCOs in the Marine Corps who would have killed such a piece of human excrement on the spot in the first two minutes of this clown show, purely out of autonomous reaction, pled guilty, and gotten a Navy Commendation Medal from the Commandant of the Marine Corps for that response.

In the Fleet Marine Force, a guy like this would have received E-tool counselling in the field, and never come back after a field exercise. No loss, net gain.

Hint: This is an E(ntrenching)-Tool

If during wartime in a combat zone, one of the grenades on his belt would have had the safety pin removed. Oopsie. Too bad. So sad.

Sorry, squids: you're now a national joke, and an international laughingstock. They should issue all of you rainbow wigs, red ball noses, and clown shoes in basic training until further notice.

This is what all those rusty Navy ships look like on the inside.

And why I can't even talk about the current state of the military anymore. If this hadn't plopped onto my YouTube page today, I could have died happier someday. Pretty much like the US Navy already has.

Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!

I'ma just leave these two items regarding two different Trump witch hunts right here...

Judge in Trump classified documents case suspends trial indefinitely

Porn star loses it in court: Stormy Daniels starts yelling during questioning

"I cannot spare this man; he fights." - Abraham Lincoln

Gray Man, My @$$

And that was from among other Bostonians, which is really saying something.
He also managed to be top of the list for nearly every
"Detain and hang on sight" order from 1775-1783. 

Become ungovernable. Find your balls, grow a spine, and dare to attempt great things. It's your birthright, and it's in your DNA.

The Real Ministry Of Ungentlemanly Warfare

Once upon a time, cannibals attacked a circus, and they caught a clown and ate him.

One cannibal said to the other one, "This tastes funny..."

I bring that up, because the local pro-terrorist sit-in at Penn was approached by Homer J. Doofus, and he filmed himself bravely goading them into threats of violence.

You can hear all about it at Divemedic's place.

The guy in the linked vids on X was a pure unmitigated idiot.

Smarter moves he could've done, but hadn't the wit to do?

Here are some things one or more motivated individuals might choose to do on their own:

Caveats: Obey the law. Follow all rules. Remove shirt before ironing. Do not taunt happy fun ball. YOYO: You're On Your Own. Big Boy Rules Apply.

A) Infiltrate

Hey, they've been infiltrating right-of-center rallies for years. Payback is a bitch. Get a couple of long-haired younger friends to "join" their noble cause. Make contacts. Shoot video. Map out the whole thing from the inside. See if you can trip to who all is funding and supplying them. Specifically, or generally. This is a tale as old as time, in the second oldest profession. It worked for Chico in The Magnificent Seven. Maybe text their plans to an outside contact, in time to thwart them. Afterwards, send a fully-detailed and anonymous briefing (who, what, when, where, how) - most obviously, one that doesn't lead straight back to your Benedict Arnold - to the local constables, the state police, and the feds. Maybe even Interpol, and other agencies as well. Oh, and send copies to people like James O'Keefe, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, et al. It's going to get picked up. And cockroaches hate light. 

Follow-up outrage and prosecution may follow. Give it a shot. "Guerrillas swim in the sea of the people." - Mao. So maybe poison their ocean for a couple of generations. Bonus points: Plant incriminating info in a burner phone (you know how to make one of those happen, right??) on one of their leaders that make it look like they're really the leaker, then sit back and watch the resulting struggle sessions and re-education as they fight amongst themselves.

B) Gather Intel from outside

[Pro Tip: Army and Marine snipers are far more effective - and lethal - with binoculars and a radio than they ever are with a scoped rifle. Learn a lesson there.]

Log movements. Identify faces. No one can maintain facial camo in public indefinitely. Especially that bunch of assclowns.

Figure out who the ringleaders are.

Note their response to trespassers. Who are the reaction teams? How many are there? Do they work shifts? Can they handle multiple threats at once? Especially at 3AM.

Follow as many as you can when it breaks up. Even if that's only one.

They all have to take a pee when they're at a restaurant, or take out the trash. Then they don't have a gang with them anymore. Be a real bummer if you did, huh?

C) Harass

Shoot fireworks into their encampment at all hours.

Release noxious agents from upwind.

Marine flares will travel a long way, and set things on fire when they hit, and they sell them everywhere. How interesting.

BB guns sting. I recall the DC snipers hiding inside an empty car trunk. Probably works for pellet guns too, with even less sound. Just saying.

Anybody who's ever played in the northern latitudes in late fall or winter knows paintballs can become frozen. And hurt like a m*****f***er when they hit. Head shots have been known to cause concussions and unconsciousness. Imagine what a crotch shot with a .68 caliber marble feels like. So knowing that, who needs rubber bullets? BTW, it's always winter inside your freezer. Hmm.

Slingshots are small, concealable, and readily discarded.

Chemistry majors can whip up some butyric acid. It'd sure suck if someone fired a water balloon filled with that sh*t-stink into that camp.

Or one filled with skunk scent.

Or just launched some rotten meat and fish, and turned loose a bunch of rats and such.

And waited for the skunks, possums, and 'coons nearby to discover things for themselves.

Feral dogs? Fuggedabodit. Comedy gold.

Take a lesson from Samson: he turned wild foxes loose with torches tied to their tails into the Philistines' crops. What could be more appropriate to a camp of pro-Palestinians? Fresh out of wild foxes? How about cats? Roombas? RC trucks with glass jars of flammable liquids?Flaming bags of dog poo? Endless possibilities.

D) Sabotage

Most of these idiots asked for food, because they never thought of that. So send them some. Imagine a frat getting together to have 100 Big Macs (or Fake Meat. Or Tofu. Whatever.) delivered - after they all smear a little "special sauce", i.e. biological waste product (human sh*t) on them. Not enough to taste right off, mind you. But in 10 hours or so...it's going to get messy in that camp, and take the fight right out of them. Trust me on that. Some chicken entree by Chef Sal Monella is always a dish best served lukewarm. The myriad ways you could jack up "sealed" food containers is legion. Fruit, like oranges and bananas and apples, are easier still. All I'm saying, is imagine 500 people all on an acid trip at the same time. Or all trying to use the can 10 times an hour, between projectile vomiting spells. Gastroenteritis doesn't kill people as much as it makes them wish they were dead. Bon Appetit, commie pigs!

What, you think the cops don't send in a Valium-sprinkled pizza to barricaded suspects?

Grow up.

Speaking of the po-po, are they guarding the miscreants and enabling them? Might want to donate a case of specially-flavored water to them too. 

On the topic of human waste, those goons are sh*tting somewhere, and not in their pants. Find the portajohns. Block the service trucks, by any means necessary. Call around, and cancel their servicing. Drill holes in the portajohn holding tanks, so the contents go in one hole, and out the other. Sabotage the permanent plumbing in nearby buildings so they have no options there. The "occupiers" will get the blame for that move too. [Hint: women are far fussier about that than men. Ask me what happens when "somebody" shuts off all the flush valves in the women's dorm. All. Of. Them.] Win-win.

If you get real lucky, you may trigger any number of disease outbreaks in that encampment. Boo frickin' hoo.

Don't overlook the opportunity to pass out bottles of "hand sanitizer" that are just thinned out vaseline. Or cooking oil.

Let your imagination run wild with all the things that might be done to personal care products: toothpaste, mouthwash, liquid soap, shampoo, etc. Nota bene: Syrup of ipecac mixes with a lot of things.

Sucks for them if they didn't pay attention in the siege warfare section of history class, doesn't it?

Snow fencing? Be a real pisser if someone tied some marlin-grade monofilament to it, and the other end to a car bumper. And then drove away. Probably scatter tents and the campers inside ass-over-teakettle. Definitely gonna f**k up their circadian rhythms, i'n'it?

Can you get close enough to shoot water from a super soaker into the camp without getting swarmed? Swap the water for battery acid. That stuff eats through nylon fabric - like tents - with a vengeance. Burns too. Ask me how I know.

Find the sprinkler controls for that quad. Let your imagination run wild there.

Maybe you can find a crop duster who's not above using them for brushfire water drop practice.

Can't throw them out of helicopters? Learn from a M*A*S*H* episode: find one willing pilot, and drop a load of festering garbage onto them instead. At O-dark-thirty.

In short, be devious, cruel, and nasty, instead of stupid. 

Because let's face it: it was the Legion Of Misfits who decided to emulate tactics last seen at the Little Big Horn and Dien Bien Phu. The least you could do is teach them a historical lesson about forting up in the middle of hostile territory. The more hostile, the better they'll learn.

And FFS, stop making facecrack videos about it.

F**k me, Leftards?

No, Fuck YOU. Twice as hard, and no lube.

Remember: It's not funny until it's not funny.

Then it's hilarious.

I'm not telling anyone to go out and do any of this. No, really.

I have no knowledge of how the commies who were harassing the folks stopping illegals on the border in the early 2000s might have had their camps and campfires salted with OC and CS powder at 4AM, or how raw chicken livers might have been launched amidst them with slingshots at night, and game calls might have brought every pack of coyotes for miles to come sniff around right outside their tents until the Young Leninists decided to go back to town, because the border wilderness was a bit too wild to be good little communists in.

And I'm not telling anyone to go out and do anything. You have agency. I just submit the preceding "for informational purposes only".

Because I'm expecting that college kids and others will have the wit to figure this sort of thing out all by themselves, on their own. 

I mean, sweet suffering Shiva, the Hayduke "Revenge" books have been in print since the 1970s, Edward Abbey wrote The Monkeywrench Gang in 1975, and Animal House came out in 1978. So WhyTF should the eco-terrorists of EarthFirst! have all the fun?!?

But I'm absolutely expecting the laughs and memes afterwards will be epic.

And if any of this had you clutching your pearls in shock, you're part of the problem, not part of the solution.

OTOH: If you've got so little as a handful of dedicated fellow @$$holes to join you in this quest, you should be able to half-ass that into your own A-Team, and take charge of any campus AO, until Team Fascist starts crying like little bitches.

And remember, kids: lest anyone think this sort of thing is beneath their dignity, recall that many of the guys who showed up from Lexington to Concord Bridge got their start dressing up as Indians and pulling a prank on 342 cases of tea. Mighty oaks from humble acorns grow.

You Will See This Material Again

h/t and full props to zorost99

This phenomenon will be familiar to most men, especially most of the married men.

Feel free to copy and paste this appellation and/or the accompanying meme whenever and wherever appropriate.

It won't put out the flames, but like those colored campfire additives, it'll make them more fun to watch.

Better Then? Yes and No.

 h/t CW

Polio. Smallpox. Communists. Permanent military draft for 26 years ('48-'73. You could look it up.) Endless Democrat Congresses. Rotary phones, from Ma Bell only, with monopoly pricing to match. 8" B&W TV. AM Radio. Yesterday's news at the speed of teletype. Adding machines and slide rules. Duck-and-Cover. Air travel by prop plane. Train and sea passenger travel normal. Bumps in the two-lane highway big enough to eat the car, with an endless progression of one-horse towns with crooked cops running speed traps. Jim Crow. "Colored only" sports leagues, restrooms, dining rooms, bathrooms, bus seats, and drinking fountains.

OTOH:

No digital surveillance and tracking of everything from cradle to grave. Always paying cash. 5¢ candy bars. 50¢ meals. Houses cheap enough a guy at the gas station could afford to live in one. Fishing and hunting season were celebrated. Long arms in your truck window, a pistol in your pocket, and a real knife on your belt were all legal. Not locking your doors and leaving the keys in the car resulted in...nothing bad happening. Terrorism??Never heard of it. Knowing all your neighbors, and them knowing you. Families that lasted a lifetime, for all races, because divorce required good cause. Never pressing "1" for English. Never hearing a phone ring or someone jabbering on one anywhere but home or work. Abortions rarer than hen's teeth.

Not everything was better then.

But certain aspects of life were a notable improvement.

It Must've Been A Superpower

Ponder, even for a few minutes, what saddling the republic with these three unmitigated douchebags for nearly 20 years combined (out of the last 32) has done to this country. If most people could've seen 2024 from 1993, they'd have gone all torches and pitchforks 30 years ago. Just thinking about it now, you'd be able to watch your blood pressure rise like the tide, in real time.

Sunday Music: Vincent

Don McLean's other masterpiece.

See What I Did There?

Nit-pickers would argue that it would be an intelligent design.

Yes, But...

Even ordinary men have a limit beyond which they will not be pushed.

Peter at BRM thinks some folks are "fedposting", i.e. inciting violence. That suggesting people need to be tossed from helicopters or shot in the face is going too far. And that civic decorum must needs be maintained.

His blog, his rules. 

Some folks posting may indeed be feds; entrapment is what they do. Buuuut...

People haven't "had it" yet, because they aren't doing it.

And the fedposting is, as usual, the Usual Anonymous Suspects. As always.

But it's myopic to think one side can (or should) unswervingly maintain the ROL unilaterally.

It was 77 "terrorists" on Lexington Common who touched things off last time, and shooting people in the face was suddenly in vogue.

Some tyrants don't learn any other way, and most people realize, generally belatedly, that all their efforts at a peaceful solution were nothing but appeasement, which enervated their allies while emboldening their enemies to push farther and harder.

What can't continue, won't.

Feds are gonna fedpoast; it's all they've got. They've seen what happens when they try the direct approach. It never turns out as they'd hoped. Boo frickin' hoo.

"There's nothing wrong with shooting.
As long as the right people get shot."
- Inspector Harold Calahan, SFPD

But you have the literal brownshirt army and senior political leadership, from the Oval Office on down(!), already spearheading open calls to consider the right half of the country terrorists, kill them, lock them in concentration camps, and re-educate them. The trouble is, all of us know where those boxcars drop off, and we won't be having any of that this time, nor anytime.

The fuse is lit and only getting shorter Peter, and however that saddens you, you're wise enough to recognize it isn't going to grow itself longer over time.

We're already living in what is a total and unmitigated banana republic except admitting its existence  openly and outright. And that minor lack is a pretty thin fig leaf over what's been going on for years, stretching into decades.

The question isn't whether or not things blow up.

It's only down to where and when, and the only thing standing between this moment and that one is random circumstance, and a few pounds of trigger pressure.

Then the ball is open, and the range is hot in both directions.

Pointing those truths out isn't calling for it. It's just reading a thermometer on a boiler headed for an explosion. What's coming isn't rhetoric and philosophy. It's chemistry and physics.

Trick Question

There are no college students in the picture.

They're all professional agitators and paid crisis actors, getting their usual fawning tongue-bath from their butt buddy fellow communists in the enemedia. Divemedic has a few examples from the recent USF shenanigans. Peter at BRM is on the same trail. (UPDATE: Middle Of The Right piles on too.) Seems all the wheels are coming off the "spontaneous protest" wagon.

This has been nothing more than another astro-turfed "grassroots" nothingburger.

No word on when they'll be arresting terrorism-funder-in-chief Soros for all this orchestrated and catered nonsense and violence, and getting him the Waterboard Suite at the GITMO Hilton, but it should have been 10 years ago.

Just as it would be instructive to start shooting at the "Patriot Front" whenever they hold a rally, to force the FBI to explain why they inexplicably had 42 agents wounded in one day, the police responding to these protests should switch from rubber bullets and tear gas to copper-jacketed lead, so that people could note the number of 45-year-old Clinton regime holdout career criminal troublemakers and 70-year-old aging hippies from the 1960s with new bullet wounds or posthumous FAFO Medals making up and directing 98% of the current round of fake unrest going on at the moment.

Stock up on canned goods. It's going to be a bumpy year.

Woodschlock 2024

 h/t Odd Job

Pratchett's Law Of Thermodynamics

Latest From CA

WRSA: 

It does indeed appear as expected. To which progress we add hearty encouragement:

Sunday Music: Goodbye Stranger

 

Supertramp's Top Twenty (#15) hit from 1979, off their quad-platinum album Breakfast In America, with a killer guitar solo close.

Serving A Niche Market

We already have pre-booked orders to pick up two busloads of pro-Hamas demonstrators, paid in advance.

Note to JT in Springfield: No, we can't "mess with the GPS" of certain motorcades to accomplish the same thing, and you already know why after your last chat with The Guys In Black Suits Wearing Earpieces. Stop asking. But yes, you're right, that's pretty funny. Theoretically.

About WRSA : UPDATED

As we offered sincere congrats at the blog's (brief) return, we offer our heartfelt condolences to CA, currently fighting it out with software that falls over and crashes with more frequency and predictability than even Emperor Stumblefuck Poopypants the Ist.

It's got to suck to go through, but the struggle continues, and we hope it concludes well for the site's permanent return.

UPDATE: Read Cold Fury host Mike Hendrix's comment, cf. this announcement at his site,

And CA's first entry.

TL;DR: WRSA is now hosted at Cold Fury until further notice. Pass the word.

None of us is stronger than all of us.

How...Curious

We have known for at least a year and a half that Gulag's minions were jacking around our blog view counts, since the day we watched them march backwards, in real time, and then stay at zero for hours, popping up to 2-3/minute, then reset to zero over and over again. (Of course, that never happens in Philadelphia or Atlanta vote counts, nosiree...) 

We've never trusted the tally since, but we aren't too wrapped up about it either way, (other than a certain amount of surprise and humility whenever another million rolls over the odometer) and after a certain amount of screwing around, after steadily rising over the years, since the noted horsing around incidents, it's settled into a routine of 5K-10K/day, depending on content. 

Which was apparently what we were supposed to assume.

We are beginning to suspect that whatever or whoever was doing the screwing around has lost its touch.

Out of nowhere, the reported view tally two days ago was 67K, yesterday's is 22K, and so far today we're at about 14K. Before we posted anything.

Maybe someone's screw-around-with-rightwing-blogview software has reached the end of tech support, and now the actual views are getting through unfiltered.

It doesn't change anything, and just underlines that the viewcounter is whacked, but it's funny to watch.

Hey, Lamestream Newsholes

And while we're up... 

Seen today on CNN, Fox, or some other idiotic channel:

Dear Media Muttonheads:

That silly-assed chyron implies that somewhere in Florida, there are friendly, gregarious, happy-go-lucky alligators that wouldn't regard two-legged deer as an item lower than themselves on the food chain at every opportunity.

Alligators aren't vicious. "Vicious" implies deliberate and conscious forethought. There is no premeditation and moral calculus going on in a reptilian brain the size of an almond, provided with rows of sharp teeth like a picket fence. They're simply being alligators, you incredible bunch of idiotic fucktards. If you want to be pedantic, there aren't any alligators other than vicious, which at minimum makes the adjective retardedly redundant. It's as uselessly duplicative as writing "idiot reporter" or "stupid TV news editor". Any journalist nowadays might as well just wear a dunce cap everywhere, and save the expense of printed business cards. 

This kind of silly horsesh*t is what happens when news outlets hire J-school graduates to write the chyrons, who place somewhere between midwits and morons on the college graduate IQ scale.

For the benefit of media morons everywhere, the only friendly alligators in recorded history were last seen during the Ponchielli Dance Of the Hours segment of Fantasia in 1940. They exist nowhere in real life, and if you'd only hire people who didn't learn everything they know about the planet from watching cartoons, and think that's real life, you bunch of self-important idiot savant dipshits wouldn't to be smacked about the head and shoulders with cluebats like this reminder 24/7/365/forever.

But at least it explains why Biden seems smart to you: Because compared to you all, he is.

Meet Cowardly's Cousin, Pissed

h/t Daily Timewaster

Sunday Music: Burnin' For You

 

Apropos of the preceding meme, we choose B.O.C.'s 1981 Top 40 (#1 on the Mainstream Rock chart) hit for today's musical pick. It's sat on our rotisserie of pending SM picks, and we're happy circumstances have provided us an excuse to put it up today. Not least of which, in hopes that more Leftards will choose the pyrrhic form of protest, in every sense of that word.

Thought For The Day

 

Welcome Back

While we know CA has long maintained alternate comms and outlets, we take the time today to welcome the restored WRSA website back among the land of the living. Which is also apropos of the day. Just a coincidence, we're sure.

This Is Why Retards Won't Sign Their Memes

As found multiple places this past week or so:

Nota bene: Retards never sign their memes.
Like with this one.

Dear Lazy Common Core Grad and (probably actual racist) Ignorant Fucktwat:

We realize you probably graduated at the top of your pledge class with a D+ average, but to help your bankrupt fund of information, allow us to present:

George Washington Carver inventor, author and professor

Holder of three patents, author of 44 agricultural bulletins, including How To Grow The Peanut and 105 Ways Of Preparing It For Human Consumption, as well as bulletins that detailed how to rehabilitate the soil of Southern states overplanted with cotton, by rotating crops like sweet potatoes, cowpeas, alfalfa, wild plum, and tomatoes, as well as bulletins on cotton itself, raising poultry, hogs, dairying, ornamental plants, preserving meat in hot weather, and nature study in schools, while heading the Department of Agriculture at the Tuskegee Institute for 47 years, until his death in 1943. For his life, work, and contributions to agriculture, he was honored with degrees, museums, having his likeness on U.S. coinage, postage stamps, having a Liberty ship named after him, as well as numerous schools, parks, and plant species.

Charles R. Drew Physician, medical professor, medical pioneer and inventor

Did his doctoral thesis on extending the usefulness of collected blood, which research was applied to the collection of both plasma and whole blood, saving thousands of lives during WW II in both Britain and the U.S. First African-American to earn a Doctorate of Medical Science. Became the director of the first American Red Cross Blood Bank, pioneering the concept, and also inventing the bloodmobile, for mobile collection of blood products. Literally responsible for saving millions of lives worldwide from 1940-five minutes ago, ad infinitum.

Garrett Morgan Inventor

Invented the modern traffic signal, to prevent serious traffic accidents.

Patricia Bath  Physician and inventor

Holder of 5 patents, including the first laser that allowed for laser correction of cataracts.

Daniel Hale Williams Physician, surgeon, and medical pioneer

Performed the first successful open heart surgery, in 1893.

I hold no brief, nor apologize for innumerable Dindus and wastes of skin and oxygen on this continent going back to about 1610, whose sole contribution to America or life in general is countless coroner's cases, and a prodigious amount of FAFO medals and Darwin Award nominations. I am second to no one when it comes to pointing and laughing at their boundless Clowncarnucopia of Fail. Dogpile on them all you want. We do, every chance we get.

But to be wholly ignorant of the above examples, and any dozen or two more, is to pull one's own trousers down, and spank their own ass in public, for the whole world to see. We learned of the first three of those in grade school, long before woketarded PC became a thing, when Nixon was president, FFS! Crack a friggin' book!

Somebody wants to change the original fucktarded meme from black to Sub-Saharan African inventions and technological advancements, go ahead on.

But anybody posting the original, as found, ought to see to a tourniquet for their dicks, to staunch the blood flow caused by their own cleats.

Check yourself, before you wreck yourself. Word to your mother. We yell because we care.

Three - Maybe Four - Options

 

From most likely to least likely, IMHO:

Option One

As discussed previously, Israel lets Iran's next attack automagically destroy the Dome Of The Rock, then sits back and watches Iran take on the rest of the Islamic world for their stupidity, while they rebuild the third iteration of the Temple on its historical site.

This has been how Israel traditionally rolls. They sow chaos among their enemies, let their enemies' own internal conflicts serve Israeli interests, and reap the benefits, with carefully placed action. 

This is the David Option, putting one stone in Goliath's forehead. Which sends the Philistines (from whence narrow coastal strip tribe's name the modern word "Palestine" comes) fleeing for cover. History doesn't repeat, but it often rhymes.

Option Two

Israel and the Western powers continue to soak up and largely fend off Iranian attacks until someone comes up with a better plan, at a disparate and profligate waste of money and ordnance on all sides but Iran's. Which emboldens Hamas, Hezbollah, and every other whackjob jihadi group on the planet, multiplying attacks and provocations endlessly, and destabilizing the world to the benefit of countries like Iran, Russia, China, and North Korea. IOW, the exact pain-in-the-ass countries perpetually since 1950, and the current status quo since about 1974. This is the "Nothing Ever Changes" Option.

Option Three (maybe)

Israel expends another $1B on the next attack, which costs Iran less than $100M. The West decides the lemon isn't worth the squeeze, and Israel, going broke slowly or quickly, gets wiped off the face of the land there "from the river to the sea", fulfilling the most fervent expectation of generations of impotent Arab Muslims since 1948. This is the "Sh'yeah, when monkeys fly outta my butt!" Option.

Option Four

Israel gets tired of Iran's shit, and recognizing Iran has moved from largely impotent threatener to a nation actually capable of carrying out its endless calls and threats to destroy Israel, rolls up all Iranian provocations, incitements, and actions against Israel since 1978 into a ball and decides to present Iran with a bill. 

It comes in the form of a general nuclear strike on Teheran, and any number of lesser cities and all identifiable nuclear facilities in Iran, to the public outrage and quiet delight of every non-Persian country bordering/adjacent to Iran, not least of all Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, and Russia, and to a large extent, about 90% of the United States (The vocal minority loses their collective shit, which isn't Israel's problem anyway.) 

Israel decides if they're going to be treated as a pariah by most of the world for decades, they might as well act like one, and ends their troubles with a near-nuclear state before it becomes a nuclear peer-to-peer contest. 

Iran, as a result, dissolves into a Yugoslavian polyglot of competing (surviving) groups, and large hunks of it are nibbled off by competing states and groups, ceasing to be anything of interest for a century. The Kurds carve out a homeland (pissing off Persian, Russian, and Turkish counter interests, which is a geo-political hat-trick), Iraqi Shi'a are largely turned into the Sunni's bitches, the Yemeni conflict is mopped up, Hamas surrenders or dies in Gaza, Hezbollah is strategically weakend in Lebanon, and the House of Saud takes the opportunity to do a large-scale roundup and execution dump of troublemakers of all factions within the kingdom. All of which heralds a decline of terrorism worldwide for 10-20 years, at least from the plethora of Iranian-sponsored @$$holes, who are generally 80-90% of all the world's incidents. This is the "Wouldn't It Be Nice" Option. 

{We could have made this last Option Five, substituting an identical strike, but with conventional weapons, as Option Four. But:

a) Israel couldn't accomplish that mission without multiple conventional strikes, a scenario unlikely and probably increasingly impossible after any initial strike, with dwindling and probably insufficient IAF resources in the first place. (Pay attention: Even Japan wasn't stupid enough to make Pearl Harbor a three-day raid.)

b) You don't take geo-political half-assed half-steps, and Israel prefers lightning strikes, not rolling thunder.

c) Nukes get the job done all at once, which is the entire point of the exercise.

Thus, a conventional strike, or strikes, are even - in fact far - less likely than a general nuclear reckoning, and frankly Iran has been begging for a Hiroshima enema from anybody since about 1978, on general principles.}

Nota bene: None of these are The Samson Option.

For Common Core grads, biblically/historically Samson, mighty judge of Israel, shorn, blinded, and a prisoner of the Philistines, asked to be taken to the pillars of the palace where the feast celebrating his enslavement was occurring, whereupon he summoned one last burst of his former strength to push the pillars aside, collapsing the place on himself and his tormenters simultaneously.

The modern equivalent would be Israel launching nuclear strikes at every capitol and major city of the surrounding Arab nations while on the verge of destruction by them, which is nowhere evident to any degree at the current time. Lebanon and Saudi Arabia tapped out after 1948; Jordan after 1967, and Egypt after the 1973 war. Syria continues, mainly because it signed no peace accords, and gets no hush money as a result, and they control Lebanese territory since 1976, and the dissolution of Lebanon as a coherent state. Iran has been too far removed to touch Israel directly (until this week), relying solely on third-party terrorism by surrogates, and thus avoided Israeli direct wrath for the same reason.

Until Obozo broke a decades-long policy on the part of the U.S., and sold Israel air-to-air refueling aircraft and capabilities, which now makes Iran no longer a one-way suicide mission, and instead makes it a nation well within the strike capabilities of the IAF, and the 50-100 nuclear weapons Israel "doesn't have".

Bummer for the Iranians, who have now entered the chatroom.

---

"Interesting times".

A Chinese veiled curse for good reason.

Garment-rending, teeth-gnashing, and poo-flinging disputes in Comments. We're out to play all day, so nod, or rage on, at your discretion. We'll moderate and push through the replies upon our return. Anonymous screeds from the Usual Suspects will be mocked or disappear at bloghost's whim, depending on how much our claws need sharpening on the scratching posts of your impotent rage.

Hilarity Ensues In 3, 2, ...

 

I'm taking bets for pool markers that the next time Israel is faced with incoming Iranian missiles headed for the Al-Aqsa Mosque complex, AKA The Dome Of The Rock (which sits on the exact site of Solomon's original Temple, and the next iteration of it destroyed by Titus of Rome in 70 A.D. , and also the exact site whereupon Abraham - the father of both Jews and Arabs - was to have sacrificed his son Isaac before God's angel stayed his hand), or anywhere close, they step back, and watch the impacts, without lifting a finger. For the uninformed, the western edge of that complex is the Wailing Wall, the only surviving remnant of Solomon's Temple from Herod's expansion of the rebuilt Jewish Temple from about 586 BC, on the site going back to King David's era, nearly 1000 BC. There's just a little history related to the spot, kids.

A) Iran gets fingered beyond dispute for the attack on the third holiest site in Islam and its destruction, from which site, traditionally for Muslims, Muhammad ascended to heaven. What could go wrong with Persians blowing that dafuq up, right? "O noes, Iran! Pleeez don' trow us Jews into dat' der Brair patch!"

B) Mohammed has left the building, effectively doing the dirty work on Israel's behalf, and opening the path to bulldoze the rubble, and rebuilding the next iteration of Solomon's Temple on the holiest site in Judaism, long squatted upon by Islam after the Jewish Diaspora.

C) Bonus points if some clever subterranean archaeology finds an Israeli booster charge already in place to make sure anything larger than a breadbox hitting the Temple Mount vaporizes the Islamic shrine completely. Oopsie. Too bad, so sad. Extra credit on that if Israel's excuse for no response next time is anything like "Hey, sorry, we defended it last time, but that earlier attack depleted our defensive missiles(!), and, well, stuff happens, ya know? Bummer, Mooselimbs...inshallah, right?"

D) Double bonus: the rest of Arabic Pisslam decides Iran delenda est for the outrage, while Israel focuses on their newest civic works project. Suddenly Iran is a wee bit too busy to screw around with Israel for a decade or three, what with the entire Arabic world hitting Iran with air and missile strikes around the clock, and all. The horror...the horror.

E) Triple bonus: Accidentally (or any value of "on purpose") multiple other strikes "from Iran" also automagically take out widescale Arab settlements in Gaza and the West Bank, allowing Israel to reclaim the entire land "from the river to the sea" scot free, and watch Teheran eat the mother of all sh*t sandwiches for the act(s).

Hilarity ensues all around.

Get in on the pool: Place your markers.

UPDATE: We're sure it was pure wild coincidence that this post got 6660 views yesterday.

Nothing to see here.

Sunday Music: Big Time

 Peter Gabriel's #8 single from 1986, featuring the stop-motion video a la his previous hit Sledgehammer.

Dumb F&@king Squids

It should be understood from the outset that I have no actual animus or disdain for the airedale aviators of the brownshoe navy, the bubbleheads of the silent service, the bosuns of the surface fleet, the throat-slitting amphibians of Navspecwar, nor for the lowly messmen of the gator freighters, nor even the clerks and jerks at shoreside bases, dedicated professionals and brothers in arms one and all.

But when a commissioned officer of the US Navy steps on his dick so publicly that everyone from SecNav and the CNO downwards has to concoct excuses and scramble for cover, it's pretty clear that all semblance of any sort of professional military organization has gone down the shitter and been flushed out to sea.

(For those blissfully unaware, the scope on that weapon is installed backwards, and the lens cap is still in place, leading one to question whether Goldbraid Numbnuts there could have managed to hit the ocean's surface even with gravity helping him out. The Navy Recruiting dorks, who used to go by the helpful description of "press gangs", had to pull the pic from a national recruiting ad campaign, and it's now safe to say that the pic of the screw-up will be far more widely seen - and laughed at - than the entire actual recruiting campaign ever would have been. Especially in Marine, Army, Air Farce, and Coastie barracks and wardrooms. Blood on the quarterdeck, swab jockeys.)

Congratulations, Captain Squidly, you've done more to embarrass the United States Navy in one picture frame than did two aircraft carrier fires during the Vietnam War. And against monumental odds, finally made the US Air Farce seem competent and professional by comparison.

Hence the title of this post, repeating a phrase uttered by hundreds of thousands of Marines, millions of times (usually, about once a week), every time they cast a narrow-eyed and disbelieving glance upon the antics of the sister service and its minions, around the world, probably since five minutes after the first detachments of Marines shipped out aboard Continental Navy ships in 1775.

"Almost"

And that's all we're going to say about that. 

FAFO Medal, with Gold Star

 

You're Driving While Black in Chicongo. Five plainclothes Chicago PD officers in an unmarked vehicle pull a traffic stop on you, under circumstances perhaps questionable or perhaps not (immaterial, as it turns out).

You refuse to comply with orders, they see/discover you're packing heat, point guns in your direction, get loud, and you elect to shoot your way out of the situation, initiating the first volley and wounding one of the officers (who is also black), firing just shy of a dozen rounds at them. Poor life choices achieves Peak Stupid.

Because the correct response to "Roll down your windows" is not "Draw and fire your gun at the police". Ever.

The other four officers, both for general purposes, and some of them because they note that one of them has already been shot by you, proceed to unload a number approaching 100 rounds into you, your vehicle, and the neighborhood, leading you to exit the vehicle midway in your final performance as a piece of Swiss cheese, before ending your criminal career as a bloody and well-ventilated lump on the asphalt. Final tally CPD 1, Dindu 0.

Bad shooting (most of which consisted of "to whom it may concern" rounds fired at and through the body and windows of Dindu's vehicle), and a horrendous amount of crossfire before, during, and after, but nonetheless a good shoot.

Why? Because it's a given that once you shoot at the police, however you came to be in contact with them initially, all further bets are off, and they get to do whatever they do, once you granted them the carte blanche  of opening the ball by pulling the first trigger. And they will reload as necessary and continue until they're tired of shooting at you. Bugger, eh?

Now, Dindu (whose name we shan't repeat) is a Good Perp, having absorbed an unknown but clearly toxic amount of lead kinetically.

Boo frickin hoo; Play Stupid Games, Win Stupid Prizes.

Gold Star designating a Darwin Award nomination for shuffling off your mortal coil and removing yourself from the gene pool is herewith authorized.

McThag posted a link to the CPD bodycam footage from all participating officers, most particularly the five who initiated the traffic stop on Dindu. Not that graphic, but it's unedited and unblurred. Consider yourself cautioned.

If there were more cases like this, there'd be less cases like this.

CPD might be faulted, and perhaps should be closely questioned, about how and why five plainclothes tactical officers are doing traffic stops - on whatever pretext - in an unmarked SUV.

But when someone thusly stopped responds by pulling a gun and opening fire on them, let alone wounds one, the po-po going all machinegun-in-Walter-White's-car-trunk is an entirely appropriate and justified response, until they're satisfied that the threat (you) are entirely neutralized. And they're gonna do that.

If this is news to you, a kevlar vest and bullet-resistant car should be in your future.

Or, when stopped and asked, you could simply present your license and registration, maybe get a ticket or maybe not, and be on your way.

Once More, With Feeling

This is war. It's talking to you in its Outside Voice.

That scares some people. Fear makes their brains not work so well.

That happens in war a lot too, by all accounts.

So if you can't grasp this reality easily in times of quiet contemplation, you're really going to get your ass kicked by it when shit's blowing up all around you and other people's body parts (and random pieces of same), along with bullets and shell fragments are flying all about hither and yon, alternately whizzing, or screaming.

People who think there are rules in a contest like war amuse people who know there aren't.

Just movies, but both illustrative of the greater point. Rules do not exist. There are certainly tactics. Tactics are but the grease that makes things move more smoothly. Tactics change, and are subject to time and place.

At other times and places, they're pointless.

Replace Sesue Hayakawa's Col. Saito with a Roman centurion from the 1st century , and Alec Guiness' Col. Nicholson is nailed to a cross in about the time it takes to whistle up some stout timbers and a few nails.

If Gandhi had tried non-violence as a tactic against the Nazi occupation, Stalin, Mao, or Tojo, instead of the upper-crust pinkie-extended British Empire, they would have made short work of him, and slaughtered millions if necessary, and still gotten their way.

You pick your tactics, certainly.

But imagining that war - any war, anywhere - is governed by rules is among the quickest ways to lose one.

There are certainly tactics  that will be more successful, and ones that will be less successful.

The same is true for strategies.

History is replete with examples of either type, for both strategies and tactics.

But it contains exactly zero "Rules Of War", as such.

Rules are for games.

War isn't a game.

If you told Vince Lombardi to get the football into the end zone of the other team, he'd have used both ground and air attacks, within the rules of football, and accomplished that mission. Touchdown.

If you told George Patton the same thing, in a war, he'd have also used ground and air attacks, and gotten the football into the end zone as well. After killing or capturing the entire enemy team. If they'd lined up against him like it was a football game, they'd all have been killed in the first burst of machinegun fire. There would have only been one side left afterwards.

War Is Not A Game.

Some people who want to think otherwise should probably write that last sentence on their hand with a Sharpie, so they don't forget it.

There may very well be things you can do that will ease the progress of such an enterprise. Those are not rules, they're tactics.

We tried to aid wounded enemy soldiers after the battle. Even in the Solomon Campaign in 1942. Until enemy wounded kept trying to kill our troops unto their dying breath. For them, the battle was never over. Okay, noted.

We didn't take a helluva lot of Japanese prisoners after that, and no one questioned that behavior, nor cited it as a violation of the imaginary Rules Of War. Not because the rules had changed, but because that tactic was foolish, self-injurious, and suicidal.

This leaves people who insist rules exist dumbfounded, and attempting gymnastics to explain the obvious reality:

You use the tactics that work.

When they don't work, you don't use them any more.

That's why nobody court-martialed Dudley "Mush" Morton for machinegunning Japanese survivors in the Pacific. Because the little bastards hadn't surrendered, and never would, even if captured. That hand got played out long before. The Japanese played by bushido, which prohibited surrender, and demanded fighting to the death, even if captured, on penalty of ultimate dishonor.

They lost the war, for a host of reasons, but not because of that tactic. (In fact, we think of that level of total commitment as pretty bad-ass when we discuss Leonidas and the Spartans, or the folks at the Alamo, don't we? We could cite further examples as late as Vietnam or even more modern times. So much for "rules".)

Victory neither proves nor disproves one side's self-imposed rules as superior. One may fight "honorably" as their own side sees it, and still lose. Armies may fight "dishonorably", and be ultimately victorious.

Santa Anna didn't lose because he was dishonorable; he gave the occupants of the Alamo every chance to surrender and depart. He didn't ultimately lose because he killed them without quarter when they refused, no matter what Texans then or now think. He lost because he wasn't as good a general as he needed to be, and because Texas wanted independence more than Mexico wanted to keep it. Imaginary "Rules of War" had Jack and Shit to do with that.

In fact, seeing that Mexico could be bested in Texas led directly to peeling off most of the Southwest a couple of years later, because we could take it. We stole California, and most of Arizona and New Mexico in 1848, fair and square because we could. Not because of manifest destiny, the divine right of kings, or the designated hitter rule. It sure as hell wasn't because we followed a better code of conduct in war. We simply killed enough of them to induce them to concede the point.

QED

That's Curtis LeMay's Theorem, not St. Augustine's, in action.

So yet again, I remind people cluelessly lost in delusion, there are no "rules" in war.

There are things you won't do. You decide that.

There may be some things a given enemy won't do.

And then again, there may not be.

When you don't get this, you wake up Sunday morning, and half your battleships are sitting on the bottom in the mud of their harbor, without warning.

Your tallest buildings may lie in a heap of rubble, intermingled with the molecules of the bodies of the former occupants.

Hundreds of your citizens may have been raped, slaughtered, mutilated, and kidnapped by an enemy that doesn't see you, and reality, the way you see it, concerning the proper conduct of warfare.

True on the American frontier any number of times from 1600-1900; true on Israel's border with Gaza last October.

The question, every single time, isn't "Why did this happen?" 

And it sure as Hell isn't "How could anyone break the "Rules Of War" and do this to us?"

The only question is "How could you be so effing stupid as to let this happen, because you were so blindly and stupidly unprepared for it?!?"

People bleating about "rules" are generally the reason a given group gets caught with their pants around their ankles, and bent over, when Trouble comes calling.

Because comforting delusions are no substitute for using every tactic that works, and being ready for your enemies to do the exact same thing to you.

When you aren't ready, you pay for that lapse. In blood.

As we've happily shown our enemies a time or three ourselves:

Don't be delusional.

I repeat this lesson, because we're on the cusp of a real honest-to-God war. You're living through a slow-rolled communist takeover of this republic. There may  be some things your enemies won't do.

Imagining that your pretend "rules" are any part of that, or are somehow magically binding on your enemies is delusionary twaddle. It's going to get you killed, enslaved, or worse.

"Victory Or Death" isn't just a cute slogan. It's been the way of the world since about Ever.

You're not voting your way out of what's to come. At best, that might be another brief reprieve in the continuing onslaught.

And if (let's be serious, when) this gets ugly and kinetic, like every other time in world history to date, comforting delusions will be an anchor around your neck in the middle of a flood.

I know that, no matter how many times I say this, some people will continue digging in their pile of delusional horsesh*t, absolutely convinced against all evidence to the contrary that they're still going to find a pony underneath it all, somehow.

This is like Christians in the arena, as the lions are released, with no other defense or recourse than resolving to taste very bad.

 "But there must be rules!"

Tell that to the cartels just before they put your head in a duffel bag; or to the jihadi getting ready to saw your head off with a dull knife.

 "But we'll still be playing by the rules, so we'll be Right! Because no rules would be just icky!"

As if no one had ever come to that conclusion long before you did:

When you're wounded and left on Afghanistan's plains

And the women come out to cut up what remains

just roll to your rifle and blow out your brains 

an' go to your Gawd like a soldier. 

- Rudyard Kipling, Barracks Room Ballads

In other words, there's absolutely nothing I'm revealing now that Kipling hadn't figured out and set to verse by 1890.

So I beseech you, as kindly as possible:

Wake. The Fuck. Up.