"Jane, you ignorant slut!"
Those of a certain age (this point will be important - keep your thumb in that spot) will remember a regular, and long-dead feature on SeeBS' 60 Minutes during the 1970s.
Reliably rabid Left-wing columnist of the era Shana Alexander, and reliably rabid right-wing columnist Jack Kilpatrick, would be tossed a cause du jour, which they would then fight over for about 60 seconds apiece, like terriers on a rat.
Mocked epically and hilariously on fledgling late-night show Saturday Night Live with Dan Aykroyd portraying Jack Kilpatrick, whose every episode's response to liberal Jane began, "Jane, you ignorant slut!"
Well, yesterday or so, for the benefit of those of you who don't visit there, this discussion, entitled Great Boomer Moments popped up over at WRSA, headed by this meme:
With my own meme-making skills still wet behind the ears, I can nonetheless recognize when someone has short-sheeted that argument just a tad. In a group originally numbering some 74M folks, the only thing one can say about Baby Boomers as a generation, is that they're all Boomers. Anything else is prima facie so logically inaccurate and truth-free that further exposition on the point is wildly inaccurate ad absurdum.
So I responded appropriately and far more accurately:
Touche', pussycat!
Equal time for opposing views. Sauce for the gander. And all that.
(Be in no confusion: website honcho CA and I agree far more than we'll ever disagree, and he runs a strict comments policy over there: Anything goes.) But I figured balance had been restored to the Force, and I toddled off to work for the evening.
And then Team Fucktard's champion came in and shit the bed, and got his stupid all over everything; to wit:
Another person who has all the ideas for OTHERS to try (all your B.S. about what ‘not’ to do for the lib’s march to D.C.- and you didn’t do SQUAT). And you have no responsibility for the current state of affairs in this country; you are a VICTIM because of your age! I guess you’re another who is pretending to have just turned 18 last November.
I didn’t vote for Soc Security (or Clinton, or Obama, but don’t let facts get in the way of your sniveling). Did you vote for Soc Sec? No? You were not of voting age when FDR was president either? But I get the blame and you don’t? OK But I bet you have refused to participate in soc sec. so you are less responsible for that cluster than those older than you. Right? [But we all know you didn’t/can’t/won’t try to refuse to pay into Soc Sec.]
But you have ZERO responsibility, because you have a “blog” and that means you’re ‘doing something’. Oooooh Aaaahhhh! BFD
BTW, didn’t you write somewhere that you live in Kalifornia? Arguably the most socialist, debt-ridden state in the union?
Hopefully I am mistaken about your residence; because only an extreme hypocrite would cast stones at people in other states who have not allowed that level of insanity to take hold in their states?
But if I am not mistaken in that:
You’re just a blow hard.
And I can see why T-fat despises your ass.
Now, look here. I'm as gentle a kitten as can be, I swear, as any perusal of this blog's pages will attest. But if you're going to walk in, shove your finger down your throat, and throw up the whole bottle of Thunderbird you drank to come up with the impetus to write such a post, I'm going to get a bar mop, grab you by the stacking swivel, and set to cleaning up your chin a little. So here, for your amusement and entertainment, is the rejoinder to that little puddle of puke (and also, because it's a three-day weekend, and I see no reason to work very hard for blog fodder today. And hell, I was pretty proud of it if I do say so.):
Gosh, yeah, you caught me, I didn’t hop on a jet to fly 3000 miles to fuck up 23 whiny crybabies walking through the VA woods.
You were there though, right?
No?
Then STFU, and go apply some more butthurt cream.
CA’s post on the topic invited thoughts; I shared mine. And you brought…what, exactly? Yeah, thought so.
Now please, do go on about how I have any responsibility for the state of affairs in this country.
Show your work.
To date, I’m guilty of having my paychecks hijacked since the age of 14 for a “benefit” that I’ll never collect: it goes bankrupt before I get there.
I’ve voted against the shit I could, every time I’ve could, at every level, volunteered for campaigns for people and measures to stop it, and donated time, money, and effort.
But I can’t outdo the work of the fucked up children of the “Greatest generation”, who started as hippies, became college professors and rock stars, and have been undermining the country pretty much non-stop since decades before I was born.
The earliest actual boomers could vote for a president was the year Nixon was elected (i.e. someone born in 1945, the first year of the baby Boom, wouldn’t be 21 – the legal voting age – until 1966); other than Nixon’s fuck-ups which gave us one-term Carter, then 12 years of Reagan/Bush,
and a peacetime boom that went unhindered into 1999, when Democrats in Congress engineered the housing bubble. But it wasn’t until boomer’s kids could vote that we got Clinton, just as noted.
And whoinhell blamed you for Social Security? Are you 105 years old??? As I noted, correctly, that bullshit was more residue of the “greatest generation” (of theft from their children), and their fathers, for stealing from their grandkids, taking SS payouts that were paid for after contributing about $1 into the system for every $1000 they pulled out before they died off. So pull your head out and read what I wrote, instead of imagining what I didn’t write.
I never claimed victimhood, just placed the blame where it was:
the Progressive fucktards who voted in the 16th, 17th, 18th, and 19th Amendments, then piled on by giving us President Fuck Dem Republicans for four terms.
Blaming the boomers for what happened 25-40 years prior, exactly as I noted, is epic horseshit.
“Refuse to pay into Social Security?” So you’re a marijuana user, or unaware that the money for that is removed before I’m paid.
If you’ve sussed out the unicorn you described, please, show your work.
So I have zero responsibility, because I have zero responsibility.
Didn’t vote for any of the fucktard nonsense, voted against it every chance I had, did everything I could. I am one person. I’m not a generation. I’m me. You’re you. That’s how it works. Group punishment only goes in kindergarten and boot camp. As a nation, we’ll all pay for the majority’s fuck-ups, but suffering because the bus driver drove you off the cliff doesn’t become your fault because you were dragged along for the ride, and some folks are doing their damnedest to GTFO the bus before it tips.
So suck it up, buttercup.
And I’ve written, not somewhere, but frequently, that I do in fact live in Kalifrutopia. Born here, raised here, probably die here. We are, indeed, the most debt-ridden state in the nation, owing to our size and population. Most socialist? Eat shit and die.
I grew up with Governor Reagan – a true communist, no?
The minute I was old enough I dumped Moonbeam the first time. After that, I – and gazillions of my friends and neighbors - put in Republican governors who ran the state wisely and well. Oh, and a President who used to be our governor, a coupla times, IIRC.
And if you look at that meme above, I cast no such stones at anyone in other states for not letting them go to shit.
But since you asked…
The fly in the ointment here was overwhelmingly not native Californians, but rather your toothless, banjo-playing kinfolk who moved here from liberal hives by the Beverly Hillbilly Okie carload, and democrat-stronghold trailer-parks from hell to breakfast, because just like Texas (now, for the moment #2) CA then (1945- ) had the biggest, most booming economy in the country. We built ships, cars, airplanes, all the parts and sub-assemblies for same, drilled and refined oil, fed the world, made 99% of the world’s TV and movies and records (records: what they called CDs and iTunes back when people here worked for a living), and created Silicon Valley.
And over time, ass-loads of liberal fucktards from NYFC, Massholes from Boston, and all the trailer-park trash on the planet flocked here.
And helpfully, besides Teddy Kennedy fucking the country over with the Immigration Act of 1965, and 98 other senators and 400 other congressman looking the other way, nobody saw a problem with the flood of wetbacks who moved in, and started staying here – instead of picking lettuce for 4 months, and scampering back to mamacita’s house in Mehico to live on that cash the other 8 months. And they voted. Like Daley Democrats, including the dead. Hippies swarmed the Bay Area first, dragging Frisco down into the sewer it became by the 1970s. And decent people, who’d lived and worked here for generations, died off, and their kids watched their homes turned into shitville in a generation or two.
(Read anything Victor Davis Hanson has written about this in the last twenty years; he’s a third-generation farmer/rancher in the Central Valley, besides a world-class Stanford historian, and watched his locale go from mainstream America to Jalisco by way of Beirut in a generation.)
The same thing happened to L.A. next, and by the 1990s, the chickenshits who came here from somewhere else got the fuck out, because CA wasn’t home, just a paycheck, and the rats and fleas had fucked it up for everyone.
(And you and countless ignorant assholes refer to them as Californians. Ha! They’re as Californian as our recalled governor, Gray Davis; or Nancy Pelosi; or Barbara Boxer. Google/Wikipedia them, and tell me where they were from. Hint: not here.)
Even our homegrown asstards couldn’t get a word in edgewise until the rot was well-and truly into the roots. We wouldn’t have had Moonbeam the first disastrous time, nor Diane Feinswein, nor countless other assholes, until things were fucked up enough that their tribes could vote them back into power. 1974/5 was the tipping point, in case you wondered, and even then, they had a run for their money until they finally imported enough migras and chased out enough weak-kneed workerbees to rule the demographics.
So now we’ve got the migras in a conga line to infinity stretching from San Diego to Tierra Del Fuego and Shanghai, and your kinfolks and their spawn, and you’ve got the chickenshits who’d rather run than fight; by all means, keep them, but first ask folks in CO and OR and WA how that’s working out for them. TX is purpling up nicely too. You’ve got the faux Californians, and the ones who think you can run away from the problem. Where do you run to next? And your toothless, banjo-playing kinfolk are still here, still in a trailer, and they have nine kids from three baby daddies, and the ones old enough to move out live in tarps along the freeways and drainage canals.
You’ve imported literally millions of your biggest, goofiest, most worthless shitbags to us, just like Mexico has. They weren’t born here. They just can’t go any further west, and the weather’s nicer.
But the most socialist? Oh FUCK no. Massholes from Bahstun are miles ahead of us there, and everyone in NYFC who’s fucked over the PR of New Yawk. And Chicongo has dragged Illinois under, Detroitistan looks like Beirut in every way, Minnesota has been batshit crazy back to being the only D state against Reagan, Baltimorons have ruined Maryland, and the open sewer of NJ are all shitastically worse than here, as are RI and CT. We might barely make tenth on the list, but only because District of Communism isn’t a state, just a rump territory, and only because WA and OR are worse, but less important, nationally, though both are far lefter in every way than CA.
Take a look at the electoral map again, smart guy:
outside the coastal Blue Hives, most folks in CA are still politically to the right of Attila the Hun. (Compare 2016 to the earlier map)
Personally, given the nuclear codes for five minutes, I’d nuke five cities (three in CA and two in Mexico), and after that, the rest of CA would be redder than a sunburned pig’s ass for a century, and the most liberal candidate we elected at any level would call Limbaugh and Hannity soft on socialism. And we’d have the radioactive mess cleaned up in 6 months, sell it to Mexico as baby food at a net profit, and have the whole CA jobs and production machine ticking like a Swiss watch again in about a year.
And among the people I know here, I’m a mainstream moderate in that view.
(For a bonus, without those 55 CA electoral votes anymore, you’d never see another Democrat in the White House this side of 2200 A.D. You’re welcome.)
Ask me about secession then.
And frankly, I’ve paid my dues. I love it here, despite the shitheads in the state capitol. Just like people in 49 other states feel about their homes. Probably even you. They’re about to go epically broke here, the wheels will come off the wagon like Venezuela and every other attempt at socialism gone inevitably amok,and I’m going to get to watch the CA equivalent of Moscow 1990, and watch the statues of Lenin and Marx here get pulled down, by necessity, if not torch and pitchfork mob. I have a torch and a pitchfork, and a healthy list of folks to hang as decorations from the city gates, come the day. Hear me, God.
I have no idea how t-Fat feels about my ass, if he has any opinion whatsoever. Why you’d drag him into your tawdry whining I have no idea.
Most folks worth the time know how to make their own arguments without outside help.
But if, despite those realities, and nothing but the rash around your ass and a sagging diaperload of ad hominem, you want to suck t-Fat’s ass, despite the fact that even he’s throttled the shit-flinging way the fuck back lately, and actually makes a solid point now and again, it’s your tantrum.
There’s always room for a guy to be all they can be, and if you want to be That Guy, go ahead on; CA runs an open comments section here, so there’s nothing standing between you and the That Guy trophy but a few more contributions as mindless and butthurtedly worthless than that last one.
Just get out your crayon and a piece of tape, and fill your name out in the blank spot below.
So, did you really want to talk about the weather, or just make chit-chat?
I think this is yours…
_______
Feel free to fact-check any of that you like, and have at it in comments.
Oh, if I should have issued a keyboard/beverage alert, my apologies.
And I do have one regret:
I didn't open the reply with
"Jane, you ignorant slut!"
As thorough a beat down as,EVER. Little disappointing that you held back. Well done, you and the cooked temperature of exhibit 1's posterior.
ReplyDeleteJW
I guess it would be insensitive to say that was a Burning Man Burn (the guy died) but damn, that was one superb Burn! Well done,sir.
ReplyDeleteRighteous!
ReplyDeleteI feel a trifle guilty in my enjoyment of your amazing piece, which would complement Dr Hanson's observations; because I' m one of those CalExpatriates - my family moved out of state for my Dad's job before I graduated HS. Still thanks for your vigorous rejoinder and speaking so well for some of the people I left behind
Boat Guy
Well said in every facet. Truly, that was a fantastic read.
ReplyDeleteAs a conservative/libertarian/republican/God,guns,country American living in CT, I'm tired of every idiot whose battle cry is "move away".
Move where? As you said "Texas is purpling." So is every supposed free state. Not to mention, as a resident of CT, my home state, I exercise more liberties than the average person I have met from the other 49 states. There's more to liberty than watching stuff explode on the youtubes.
A comparison of election maps and population density maps seems to indicate that once the population density gets below 500 people per square mile, they're going to be a bit more careful in their voting. In other words, every state has their liberal strong holds and a whole bunch of decent folks in between.
Running won't fix anything. Stay the course. Hold the line. Glad to see you're willing to stick it out in your home state.
Again, beautiful response.
Steve M.
THANK YOU. As I watched my loved South Bay (in ALL ways different from the Northern Peninsula, SF, and Berkeley back then) become filled with out-of-state putzes during the 90's, ruining a perfectly nice place to have been raised in, I knew we were in for it.
ReplyDeleteThe South Bay, home of Lockheed and Moffett Field (this was when Lockheed wasn't incompetent), Fairchild Semicoductor, Varian, etc. - well, it went tits up when the crowds started moving in for the second part of the Silicon Valley boom - not the hardware, but the 'net.
First these new assholes bitched about Moffett's air traffic (TOO NOISY! OH MY GOD THE BLUE ANGELS ARE TOO LOUD! I DON'T LIKE THE P-3s FLYING OVER MY HOME, WAAH!!!"), started honking at everyone (native Californians didn't honk and were nicer), and generally were loud obnoxious ASSHOLES. I used to call them the New York crowd.
You'll remember the bumper stickers (long since disappeared) that used to say "Welcome to California. Now Go Home". THOSE were Californians with those stickers.
A lot of us left the Bay and moved up into those red areas. Close enough to visit family in the Bay, but far enough away from the out of state asswipes who took over and ruined the Bay Area. We didn't get as many hillbillies in the Bay Area, no, we got the BMW driving obnoxious "mememememe" marketing dipwads and snake oil salesmen that STILL infest the Bay.
Up in the hills, it's still native Californian. Out of staters don't like it up here. That's JUST fine with me. It's hot, dirty farmland. I personally keep TWO roosters to keep the bastards away. People who don't like farms won't move into and gentrify a place filled with rooster noises. All of us keep a VERY close eye on the city council - they even start making A PEEP about re-zoning and they're hauled out of office. This will NOT become the Bay Area part 2.
You're right about inland. It's a different state. Just like my upstate New York relatives are completely different from the assholes I've met from NYC (have never met a non-asshole from NYC), inland Californians are completely different from coastal Californians.
That blue area inland - Nevada County? Literally 1513 vote difference between Clinton and Trump. You can thank Nevada City and Grass Valley for that - that's where some Bay Areans go to retire. In regular elections they're outnumbered, and they're still uneasy living up here. Maybe they shouldn't retire up here. They damn well know enough not to run for local office here... and everyone knows who their fruitcake retired Bay Area leftist neighbor is. So don't count that county as blue. It's NOT.
And yes, most of my neighbors make Texans look like faint-hearted wimps in terms of politics. This is still a red state, California, being run by a couple of blue areas.. until a couple of faultlines change that up with a vengeance. And they will. Not if... when.
I've no clue where this country is going but doubt it's a good place. Seems Trump is on the ropes and his only out is nuking the Norks.........or DC.
ReplyDeleteAfter living in the Colorado high country, Australia, the North fucking Bay and argh the Middle East I did find a place I can call home and feel happy about it.
My one takeaway is if your neighbors don't own a pickup, deer rifle and chain saw you ought to move.
>I have no idea how t-Fat feels about my ass, if he has any opinion whatsoever.
ReplyDeletePretty sure he wants you dead. But I wouldn't take it personally; he apparently wants another 299,999,999 Americans dead as well. Heh.
>Massholes from Bahstun are miles ahead of us there, and everyone in NYFC who’s fucked over the PR of New Yawk. [...] Detroitistan looks like Beirut in every way
>>upstate New York[ers ...] are completely different from [NYC] assholes
Definite blue to red gradient going west across Massachusetts.
As for Detroit, I drive through there about once a month, and could write a tome about it. I'll leave it at: 1) yes, Detroit DOES look as if it's been bombed; 2) Hamtramck is a more virulent example of islamicization than Dearborn that everyone whinges about; 3) near as I can tell, the only growth industry in Detroit is marijuana dispensaries. Driving down Woodward Ave (a main drag) and also 8-Mile then Gratiot, I counted an average of >1 pot shop per mile. Which is pretty amazing when you consider that MJ is not generally legal in Michigan. All that talk about "recovery" is just people making nonsensical mouth noises. Detroit is still a shithole, and has been since the 1967 riots.
Upstate NY. I dunno about NY in general, but one of my favorite small towns is East Aurora, NY (the Roycrofters were based there) near Buffalo. Driving the nearby back roads during Obama II I saw evidence of a totally different culture vs NYFC and the northeast in general, including open-air ranges, and even a few Stars and Bars in front yards. Pretty sure those weren't so much remnant Confederates as people sick unto death of bearing the brunt of not only official racism, but hypocritical bullshit racism from people who supposedly are not even capable of racism.
As for California, I am NOT with those (on the right, I mean) who would write it off and would be happy to see it leave the Union. Quite apart from practical matters (such as US Naval power, etc), parts of California are quite simply breath-takingly beautiful. Lake Tahoe ("West Tahoe is the best Tahoe"), Yosemite, the Marin headlands at sunset, the Medocino coastline in the fog (of which there is plenty), and the list goes on and on.
Well Mike, notably even he didn't pick up the commentary, having apparently finally medicated his Tourette's. If he could get that under control, he really can make a point or two, if he really tries. But he decided not to play either.
ReplyDeleteAnd I have no doubt other states are as thoroughly sick of what the hive idiots have done to their states; Without Remorse was Tom Clancy's little side treatise on what Baltimorons had done to his home state of MD, and I've known some upstaters in NY who would be happy to break the Five Boroughs out into it's own little communist collective, and then get their own state back. And so on in every state, because people are people.
And yes, this state is absolutely beautiful, in multiple places, and has been so forever. I've climbed in Yosemite in snow and ice, I've rafted the Colorado, snorkeled Channel Island kelp groves, hiked the deserts of Joshua Tree and the coastal hills, ridden the wild coasts north of the Bay Area, walked the redwood and sequoia rainforests, and spent functional years camped in the pristine solitude of the lower deserts. There is no state like this (and I wouldn't give two seconds to anyone who didn't feel the same way about their home), and I won't trade an acre of it to the liberal jackholes who just want to burn the whole thing down.
If somebody feels any place is too good for the people who live there to enjoy, like most anti-human liberals do, they should just kill themselves, and ease the burden on Mother Gaia. If they think they're going to be bootstrapping their way into that, Loren and Anonymous have the right idea above: if the roosters and rednecks don't scare them away, get a deer rifle and chainsaw, and 'splain the facts of life to 'em.
"Welcome To California. Now Go Home." (had that on my car too) should have been a statewide billboard campaign thirty to fifty years ago, along every interstate. But no one knew then what happened then, if you gave a mouse a cookie.
@ Aesop;
Delete"Eat shit and die."
You used my line.
Thanks for all your points I was born in '48. Vietnam and Desert Storm. Like you said most of the damage done by the liberals of my grand dad's generation.
regards from Georgia, overhill
Wow. Just wow.
ReplyDelete