Legit LOL'ed

Apparently, someone missed the memo that Nielsen ratings are somewhat less reliable than presidential election results from Philadelphia and Atlanta after 4 AM, and slightly more fictional than a book by J.K Rowling.

Always have been, always will be. Statistically, they're the closest thing to institutionally sancrosanct horsesh*t designed expressly to prop up the status quo there is, other than mainstream news broadcasts themselves, which is how life got so woketarded to begin with, compared to even 10 or 20 years ago.

If the media megalith admitted to the world that nobody was watching their twaddle, their revenue would fall like Black Friday stocks, and multi-billion dollar worldwide media empire bubbles would explode overnight like zits on an adolescent.

Ain't. Gonna. Happen.

"Sportsball is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful broadcast I've ever seen in my life." 

One hand washes the other, and t'was ever thus: Nielsen tells the network the Emperor's clothes are chic, sick, trés cool, and mega-bitchin'. Production companies charge retarded prices for more swill. Writers and actors think their poo doesn't smell, and God has graciously rained them onto humanity. Networks tell advertisers that their swill is worth gajillions per advertising minute. Private companies (the sucker at this poker game) fork over. Corporate boards and stockholders are told "We're buying the best airtime on the biggest shows!" No one rocks the boat, because Nielsen is the only metric anyone has. And no one wants to be the kid telling the Emperor he's naked, because then the whole house of cards tumbles down overnight, to the tune of 11 or 12 figures on the ledger.

No one wants to risk that.

Everybody inside The Biz knows it's all smoke, mirrors, and bullshit. I remember one aged old propmaster whose game was to ask everyone working on a show what TV programs they watched regularly. He could never find anyone in 20 years of trying who could ever name more than two. And his on-set polls included the producers, directors, and actors. If he took away 60 Minutes and Monday Night Football as choices, he said no one could ever name more than one show they watched. And that's the working stiffs on the set, with a keener than average interest in the product. Imagine the shiny suits in the corporate suites, and you get into negative numbers: they not only don't watch anything, they cancel things they think no one else is watching.

But they're not going to kill the Golden Goose that buys their mansions, pools, and perks. So they stick with the GIGO model that's been enshrined for decades.

So you think ratings = Reality? Hey, whatever floats your boat.

The Sportsbowl this week was the second highest-rated program since the first manned moon landing. 

Suuuuuuuuuuure it was.

And 13% of the population comprises 100% of all hetero couples.

And Biden got 81M votes. COVID vaccines are safe and effective. Food is bad for you, and bugs are good for you. The earth is overheating because of cow farts. But we can stop it if we just raise your taxes and herd you into 15-minute cities. The boxcars are taking you to the showers.

Gell-Mann Amnesia in full effect there.

FFS, mine an ancient, dust-covered copy of The Barefoot Executive from 1971, back when The Biz didn't take itself so seriously, and watch it until you realize it's more documentary than comedy.