Two members of Cleveland's Diversity (no points for guessing) came to a local Taco Bell late last night and attempted to make a cash withdrawal at gunpoint, whereupon some hardass mofos working there donated some lead to the would-be robbers' personal education accounts:
CLEVELAND (AP) – Police say three employees of a Cleveland Taco Bell opened fire on two armed robbers, killing one.Taco Bell is clearly staffed by stand-up guys, and the corporation is run by spineless nancys in footie pajamas and sipping cocoa.
Police have said two masked robbers entered the restaurant early Wednesday and ordered three employees to lie on the floor. Police say three other employees pulled out handguns and opened fire, shooting one of the suspects six times. The other suspect ran off.
The Cuyahoga (ky-uh-HOH’-guh) County Medical Examiner’s Office on Thursday said the man killed was 24-year-old De’Carlo Jackson.
Investigators say Jackson was found with a loaded gun in his hand. He was taken to a hospital and pronounced dead.
No one has been arrested. The employees who opened fire are said to be two 19-year-old men and a 23-year-old man.
A Taco Bell spokeswoman told Cleveland.com the company is “shocked” by the shooting and is offering counseling to employees.
They should be offering those employees ammunition and raises, not pussy-ass counseling.
Needless to say, customers at that particular franchise are liable to be on their best behavior for some time to come.
Police may yet track down the other @$$clown by the trail of fecal material dripping out of his shorts and down his leg, but so far, that's still in progress.
(And if/when they catch him, he gets a felony murder rap, because his partner was killed during a felony in progress. Sweeeeeeeeeet!)
To their employees, we offer only this benediction:
Nice shooting, guys!
Pity you didn't pick up the 7-10 spare.
Something to work on for next time.
Two guys 19 yo must have been carrying "illegally" - I don't even think you're allowed to own a handgun (much less carry one) if you're under 21 in Ohio.
ReplyDeleteCorrect, 21 to posses or carry a handgun in Ohio. Also illegal to furnish a handgun to someone under 21. I'm guessing there's more to the story here as to why no one was charged (yet).
ReplyDeleteBut but but 'everybody knows' that universal background checks will put a screeching halt to such behavior. Do I really need to add the eye roll (don't know how to do it anyway).
ReplyDeleteAlways nice to see stupids take the room temperature challenge. Darwin makin room!
ReplyDeletetoo bad they missed the other one.
ReplyDelete